What mask am I wearing today?
What part do I play in this play?
What game am I playing this way?
What is this game keeping at bay?

What am I trying to say?
When will I be taken away?
When will the night claim this harsh day?
What price is it I have to pay?

This is my path come what may

What am I trying to get?
What am I trying to forget?
What does this make me forgo?
Why do I ignore all that I know?

What is the reality here?
What is this sensation of fear?
Where is this truth so far yet near?
Why cling to all I hold dear?

In peace I find I am the Seer

What am I trying to fake?
Who am I trying to be?
What am I grasping to take?
Where have I left Me?

What is this cruel trick of fate?
When will this torture abate?
What time is it?
Already too late?

I sit here still and just wait

Distant bodies reach to
Jumbled mingled parts

Scintillating aching lifts to
Glorious awakening hearts

Gentle tender brushing leads to
Ancient pistons start

Sleeping giants breathe again
Dancing with the stars

Giving up all fight
Loosen the seat belt

The interstellar heart draws near
Its kisses gently melt

Bodies no longer felt
Will's be bowed and knelt

The Heart of Hearts lies in our lap
An open hand is dealt

we can only be ourselves, we are love, we are individual, we are light, we are as a cloud floating over a grand canyon and we sprinkle small droplets of moisure that we have gathered on our journey here, from the ocean and from the sea.. we go high up into the atmosphere and we meet a change of temperature.. and then we fall, returning to the earth as water, for the plants and the animals and for ourselves..we are absorbed or are digested... we pass thro.. we begin again.. we are part of a beautiful giant eco system.. a very small yet very important part.. and each small change we make in ourselves.. to love ourselves more..goes out within it...and we start over......
.................i am a cloud floating ...... .. ah bliss

Sounds like a candle-lit heaven!

Much love

Chris

Wake up starseed dreamer
A new dawn is breaking;

The bird sings
Wind rustles through the trees
Morning colours shimmer in the first rays of sunlight;

Spirit is everywhere around and within you
And you have heard the call
Can you feel the magic?

There is something different about today
Something quite exceptional
Something new to be explored - to make your own
To will for others for ever.

Now is the time to let go of suffering
Time to let go of the pain within you
Embracing the other, forgetting all fear
Forsaking the ego self
To serve as a conduit
Giving God hands.

It is no accident that you are here now
You have come to assist in the awakening
To know the magnificence - soul climbing higher
To reach for your dreams
As you would help others reach theirs;

To dare and be brave
To laugh and be innocent
To shine your love into dark spaces
And heal the broken wing;

To climb to the mountain tops
Always striving for greatness
To bathe in cool waters and lie in green fields
To feel the rich earth below you
To be still - letting love - letting God pass through you;

Child of the universe - behold the wonder of being
Behold the wonder.

From the CD The Starseed Awakening by Patricia Cori

There was a boy who would stare at the night sky. For it seemed the nights were endless and thick.

Through his tears and blurry eyes he thought he could make out a single friendly star.

But the dark clouds shut together and blocked out the poor little star.
And no matter how he prayed the star would not return, even as a speck.

So the boy despaired and cried once again, for his dream was to become an astronaut.

He told the people that he had seen a bright light in the sky and they ridiculed him and drove him out of town.

Tormented, he had given up hope but before he died he lay on the wet ground, staring into space.

He lay forever, slipping towards dreams of death when as he took his last breath, the clouds cracked open and the night sky was bright with luminous sparks of light.

His star had returned, and with it a thousand others each glowing and dancing with ethereal rainbow colours.

They fell closer towards his broken body and, approaching him, exploded into fireworks of joy. Lifting him up, carrying him gracefully up into space.

And there he rested, staring down through the foggy blackness as a great star himself.

If you look closely tonight you might see him wink.

I stumbled upon a murky door.
"Ah, welcome back"
Had I been here before?

"Come on in we are about to start
You did bring the Key didn't you?"

'What do you m.....yes, it's here in my hand!
What is this? I demand..'

"Oh Sir there is no time to wait. It is just as we planned."

'But where am I? And who...'
He was gone.
I wanted an explanation.
There was none.

Through the dark and the mist I could make out a light
And despite my best wishes and try as I might
A force drew me onward. Now stronger.
I wondered:
'What is this feeling?
This magnificent glow?
There was no chance to ponder
For shining below
Lay a gleaming casket
And all around
Beautiful music
A wonderous sound.

I knelt on the floor
This was too much to bear
'I can't take any more!
All this music and lights
And such beauty, what for?

"Just for you," said a voice
"You're the key to the door"

'But what do you mean?
I don't understand'

"Ah but you do, just hold out your hand"
There it was as before
The key to the door?

The voice called me forward
Compelling my soul
"Bring forth the Key
To complete the Whole"

I still didn't know
And I still wasn't sure
But here I was lying
On sweat glistened floor
Thinking 'What should I do
And why am I here?
What is this great casket?

"There is nothing to fear"
Came the voice
From within?

The Key turned the lock

"The Key to my Heart
Thank you, friend
Just as we planned
Now we shall ascend"

You are worthy of the highest love
You are capable of the purest truth
You are surrounded by the brightest light
You shall never die
You possess the softest touch
Your bonds reach across the universe
Your presence can still the flow of time
Angels sing of your courage
Your heart is open to infinity
You can never forget and never will be forgotten
Peace is your name
Joy is your being
Love is your body
Freedom is your soul
The birds sing for you
The sun rises for you
The trees whisper of your deeds
You are a beacon to the lost
You light up the world
You are the highest love

I see in you a rose, supple soft and sweet
I see in you a riverbed gentle at my feet
I see in you a summer morning, day dawning
I see in you a Queen
I see in you a love so pure to bend the trees
Fragile beauty, tender and serene
Yet what I see in you is me
In truth and with such clarity
For when I look into perfection
Enraptured by your eyes
I am gazing in reflection
Upon the water by my side

Peep out from your veil
Who knows what you might find
Surmount that rough wall
It keeps you trapped, blind

Stare through that haze
And meet our soft gaze
Unfazed now ablaze

Alive, unconfined
Together in no time
We swirl and we play
Until we meet a veil

Then we say
Peep out from your veil

The bell rings to signal the meeting of the Angels
I recognise you across the room
Smiling this time
It always was so
That smile always was you
You are dancing
Like an Angel
Like the Angel you always were
Always are
I glide towards you, harmonising with your rhythm
No disguises now
No barriers now
Just Love
Together again with you
We dance
Like Angels
Hand in hand
Soul in soul
Love in love
It's all a dance of Angels

If a being were created to give the world joy
it would be you
If an energy existed that could heal humanity
it would be yours
If a love were given to inspire the hearts of the children of earth
it would be yours
If heaven unleashed a force of such subtle radiance as to make the demons quiver
it would be you
If a God were to take form
She would be you

Whenever I feel down
Whenever I wish to sigh or frown
Whenever I feel like crying
A heart pops into view

A feeling overwhelms me
A river of love distends me
Overflowing, ever knowing
My love
It's you

She flies, silent on the breeze
Sprinkling the glitter of her endless love
Through her smile an ocean of acceptance is gifted upon me
Her love soaks my being, lifting my soul to glorious heights
She sees only truth and spreads only joy
Her gaze can awaken the damned
In her wake lies an eternal stream of golden light
She floats feather gentle in the black
And the darkness bows at her feet
All the while she sings
A song of beauty, of sweetness and delight
And none are left untouched by her sublime music
She shall live in my heart
Always

Where
A Soul is bleeding
God is feeding
Drape me, enslave me
Drip me unzipped

Nowhere
Are
Hearts still beating
Still
Our
Essence sensing
Mesmerising

Debilitating ache
Can paint me, the willing subject

Who is here?

What is left when all has left?

Who is right when all is right?

What remains beyond remembering?

A heart encased in frosted glass so long, a museum piece
Now an hourglass
Now our glass

The golden sand runs through your hand
There's nothing to hold, so we watch life unfold
Now a pile on the floor

Surrendered One once more

Endless
Lessons
Less Ends
Neverending
Relentless bending
Nameless blending
Shapeless rending
Faceless forming
Less is more
More or less
Silence is golden
Golden is blessed
Blessed is best
The best face the test
Truth be told
Truth cannot be told
Truth cannot be held
Truth is always bold
Is this Truth here?
Am I the Seer?

Who is asking?

Take me to the high board
Let me kick and scream
Ignore my pleas for refuge
Enough of this bad dream

Take me to the high board
Oh how they do adore
My spins and tight dives here
But I am bored
No more

Take me to the high board
Above the clouds and birds
The wind is all I have here
No more these empty words

Take me to the high board
Below a lonely scene
Let me fall and shatter
Forget all I've been

Take me to the high board
No more asking why
This dive will be my last one
No water here, just sky

Take me to the high board
The death of an i
These hands are tired of flapping
It's wings for me
Let's fly

Wandering eternally
Aimlessly it seems, through my dreams
Though beautiful dreams can be

This grass is lush green
These flowers, this stream
So much beauty to take
What inspiration could make this?

A small rustling catches my eye
Downwards I spy
A small creature
"Why hello there my friend"

'Hi. We need a word'
Huh?! He can talk?
But he's a gnome! How absurd...

'Listen here, your garden
It really is a pity
You've let it go so much to pot
It aint looking pretty'

"My garden?
I am only a dreamer"

'That's what they all say
Nice to meet you anyway
The name's Turner Tina'

Baffled, I stopped
Now no need for a scene
But can he not know of the rock'n roll Queen?
Maybe this could be some kind of test?
Ah heck he must just like Simply The Best

"So what' up there Turner?
How do you do?"

'Very well thanks, that is
if it wasn't for you'

Me? I thought
What a rude answer!
I am not used to insults from
little Private Dancers

Who is this guy?
And what is his right
To upset my dreams
Does he want to fight?

'I Don't Wanna Fight', he said
'But listen up here
There is something important
So lend me your ear

I am here,' he said
With a glint in his eye
'To offer you one last chance
Do you want to know why?

You have become so lost in dreaming
And you're so used to fear
You are forever sleeping
And you neglect your purpose here

Don't you know?
You are the Soul Gardener!

What's that you are painting with anyway?'

"Um 'does exactly what it says on the tin
Soul hardener..."

I sheepishly dropped my brush
Could it really be true
Have I really been sleeping?
What should I now do?

I am just now awakening
I am but a learner
I need some more help here
I know I'll ask Turner

"So, this Soul Gardener thing
That sounds like quite a task
What does it involve
If you don't mind if I ask?"

'Well whilst we aren't to rush
I shall tell you straight
No beating around the Nutbush
Your soul garden's at stake

See that hole over there
It's the hole of your fate
Now We Don't Need Another Hero
But we can no longer wait

You have been dumping and spilling
And chucking and filling
This hole with your stuff
Now I know you're willing

But haven't you noticed
It is never enough?
For when you think it's filled
It turns out just a bluff

You have been trying to fill it
Casting things down below
But it doesn't need filling
It just needs to grow

Obsessing over possessing
the latest new bling
Might keep you busy
But it don't mean a thing

You throw money at it
But can't you see
It's a neverending abyss
That way you'll never be free

Quiet now, listen
It's an internal kerching
Someone is calling
Can you hear your soul ring?

You fill up with possessions
And that lasts for a while
But inside is still rotten
So clean out this pile

This is a hole that cannot be filled
So dive in to the darkness
And there you'll be thrilled

For amongst all the wreckage and doubt
You may find the truth
That's what this is all about'

Well what else could I do?
I awoke to my senses
Cleared out a path
Lowered my defences

I held my breath as best as I could
Leapt into this hole
And at the bottom struck wood!

'You may find the roots', said Turner above
'It was once a great tree
Now it just needs some love'

Whats Love Got To Do With It?
I thought in my haste
As I scrambled around
In the dark and the waste

But I thought nevermind
I will give it a shot
So focused my love
'Give it all you've got!'

Encouraged Turner from high
Cheering me on

When I opened my eyes
Everything was gone

I was perched on a branch
Among varied fruit
Dangling there
Ripening suitably

Time stood still
No more need to fill
No need to be full
No need for greed
Just no need

One with a great branch
One with this great tree
No longer a gardener
But yes I am free

I feel your essence wake me like a gentle breeze fluttering through my leaves,

I hear your song and my heart melts into the river of my being,

I breathe you through me, into me; Surround me,

Feeling without touching,
Being without seeing,
Caressed and blessed,
Your flame lights up my horizon...

I ask a butterfly to carry you my kiss

I ask the wind to carry gratitude
I thank the rain for seeking out thirst
I ask the sun to stretch out the light
The flame silently burns, brighter

My eyes were open but did not see
I heard but did not listen
I felt but did not feel.

Now I awake and now I am here.

Every moment unique, a constant changing tapestry of senses.
I feel the cool earth beneath my bare feet, connecting me to the breath of the planet.
The breeze glides over my skin and the sun touches me with its warmth.
Light rain washes away the dust of my past.
Sounds known and unknown play to my ears,
Nature's vivid colours shimmer and play,
I breathe.

Simply divine guys. Thank you for sharing here.
It's delightful to see such soulful expression.
With Love
Trinity
x

We are a family of light
We are the cleansers, the the cleaners, the healers
We are here to heal this planet
We are here to soothe the spirit of humanity
Your purpose here is to shine so bright that all will fall into your diamond embrace
Your family are here with you
And here, always with you
You are a transmuter
Seek out the darkness, bring it into the light of you
Through you it will be released into love
You are a healer, a warrior of light
Your tools lie inside of you
You have been well trained and will know how to use them when the time is right
Go forth with your brothers and sisters
Shine your joy into every soul you meet
For they are wounded warriors too
Peer into their hearts and know them as
Joyous light beings on a heroic mission
Soothe their wearied spirit
Radiate the truth of your being to all who will feel you
And especially to those who can't
Bring hope to the helpless
Bring help to the hopeless
You are a catalyst for an explosion of light that will lift this realm to undreamt of beauty
Your family is here with you
Love is always with you
Transmute lies to truth
Spread wisdom ageless
Calm minds restless
Heal bodies peaceless
Use presence as your sword
Use love as your motive
Go shepherd of love
Reunite the flock
The dream is ending

Am I tired?

Is this drained?

Drained of what?

All will to fight, desire to believe, to behave, to get by, to go on, to conceive

Drunk in this dream

No fun now for me

Whipped by the backlash
Lashed by the whiplash
Stabbed in the backwash
Washed by the hogwash

I have given up on suffering
But it still likes me
Shrill bites me
Scream fights me

This cruel keeper doesn't know what else to do
But flog harder;
It is flogging a dying horse
I won't work for you any more cruel keeper

Not really here to flog now
Slipping through the mud
Standing by the slog

Focussed through the smog

Is this a glance of God?

Can't feel the spurs
The whip is silent now
Not sure if it still cracks my limbs

I am here and I am
Deep intense relentless focussed Surrender

Control me now old captors

Surround me now old foes

Smash yourself on the rocks of this cliff edge of nothing

Set yourself alight in the fire of your own burning effort

And I remain

Still silent cracked open light ablaze powerless inner awake Presence

If pain is an illusion why does it hurt?
If these wounds are not real then why do they spurt?

If I trust my head then I must be insane
But to collapse here and cry is just tears in the rain

This aching is ancient it breaks me apart
Is this really an ending or just a new start?

I'm a pawn in this game I don't have a name
The King shouts his orders
The Knights seek out fame

The Bishops do battle
And then when it's time
I humbly crawl forwards just out of line

Where I am going I don't really know
Who is in charge of these pieces below?
What is the plan and why am I here?
I can only move forwards even when death seems near

Bigger pieces have all kinds of moves
But for me it is simple, I've nothing to lose

I keep on crawling, invisible it seems
To the end of the board
To the end of the dream

They won't see me coming
They are too busy running,
In circles and backwards
And into the fight

But when I return...
Then they'll see my true light

The vacuum

The drama of the ego held so firm, close and tight
The only release from a chattering brain late at night
Attachments and material possessions ruling the roost
The mind always cautious, in search of definitive proof

The ego now banished and dissolved, no longer contained
But is it a dream...and what will fill the vacuum that remains?
Consciousness expanded, the soul moves in to take its place
The focus changes, surrender to the flow, just how to integrate?

Then as a gaping hole opens, fresh air comes rushing in
Many questions arise, few answers, much to my chagrin
Empty and lonely feelings, no words can fully express
Devoid of all meaning, beyond skewed and simple tests

Cocooned in a space bubble lies a small and fragile foetus
Its first step on life’s journey, poised to emerge to greet us
Immune to external forces but sustained vitally from within
The baby carries a unique blueprint, distortions yet to begin

Andy C

August 2009

Here I am again in this cage

I know this place well

A single keyhole ray of light shines

And as I cower in a corner attempting to drink in this lone ray they say this is all the light there is

I say let me rip the roof off this cage and dance above this dim place

This cage is no place to contain the power of this love

Let me bend the bars of this cage, one at a time if thats all the strength I have

Let my friends join me in crushing this cage that no longer serves the love that we are I am

Let the infinite one rain down its heart shaped hail stones, I can see the message of their shape even as they pound me

Let us flatten this cage, let us join as one in our longing for the love that is our nature our truth our right our home our freedom our self

The old stories shall fall like wrinkled foes

Attachments will wither as we rip their leeches from us

This caged asylum has taken all it can

Freedom beckons me homewards

And it's call is the aching in my heart

When a mad world calls me mad am I sane?
When the matrix beckons and I refuse to play the game

When a hurricane rages and all around is tossed
When every inner demon pulls to get me lost

When everyone else is running inside
To keep dry in the rain I just cannot hide

I stand here alone in this storm arms outstretched
I fear not this cold nor this wind nor this wet

Only a madman would stay out in this, say the madmen
You'll die if you stay out there, say the scaredmen

I think they are right, but I am out of my mind now
I might as well go all the way

All I have is a single inner rose
Its soft perfume soothes me
Its petals whisper to me that all is well
I love this inner rose
Its all I have to show me the way home

To every part of me, hear this.

I am sorry. I am sorry that I left you behind. I am sorry that I ran ahead of myself and left you alone. I am sorry that I forgot about you. I am sorry that I wasn't there when you needed me. I am sorry that I didn't meet you. I am sorry that I caused you pain. I am sorry that I ignored your cries. I am sorry you had to fend for yourself. I am sorry I left you unprepared. I am sorry I left you unprotected. I am sorry I forgot about you. I am sorry you were isolated. I am sorry I didn't do more for you. I am sorry.

I am here now.

I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I am here now.

I am here now for you, I will never leave you again. I am here now for you because I love you. I will give you everything you need, I will give you everything I have. You don't ever need to worry again because I am here now and I will take care of you, always and I love you.

I will protect you. You never need fear anything because I am with you now. I will protect you. Nothing can harm you now I am here protecting you, and I am here, with you, for you, I love you. I will make sure you have everything you ever need. If you are hungry I will feed you, anything you want I will bring for you. Anything. I will do anything for you, I am here for you. I love you. I will tend to you, I will care for you, you will have everything you need. If anything ever tries to harm you I will be here to protect you. Nothing can harm you now that I am here. And I am here now, always.

I will guide you. You need never worry about what to do because I will show you. I will take care of you, just follow me, trust me, I love you. I will take care of you now. There is nothing you have to do or be because I am here, I love you and I will guide you always. I know where to go, I know what to do so relax now, I will guide you. I love you.

I will nurture you. I will show you how to do anything you want; and you can do anything. Anything. With me by your side nothing can stop you. You can be anything and I will guide you, protect you, nurture you, care for you, provide for you, serve you, love you, always. I am here now. It's ok. I love you.

Rest now. You are tired of looking after yourself. There is no need anymore. I am here for you. Rest in my arms, my strength is infinite, my love is infinite and nothing can touch you now I am here. Rest, I love you. When you wake up I will still be here. I love you. All I want is to love you. I am here now, always, forever. Be at peace.

I love you.
I love you.
I love you.

I am your heart. I am the world. I am everything you see.

Rest now, you are taken care of.

I love you with all the love that is. The love that builds universes, built your heart, built you.

I love you with everything there is.

I love you.

I am always here for you.

I love you.

Life!

Do you ever think,
When taken to the brink?
The oddity of being here
And all that we hold dear

Deep joy and deep despair,
But who is there to care?

With each apparent pain,
A worthy insight I can gain

The little tiny step I fear,
So far and yet so very near

Separation and oneness
They seem to co-exist?

Open heart, open mind
Both are intertwined?

Do I ask or surrender?
How often I wonder.

Choices given to make,
Is this one give or is it take?

Action or letting be?
Both seem right to me

Benevolant or opposing
Which am I supposing?

Destruction, death, disease
Any explanation, please?

The paradoxes that exist
I could write an endless list
On and on and on it goes
All the answers, no-one knows

The complexities seem very great,
When I strive to integrate

Though strive no more...
An open door
I am walking through
I am finding what is TRUE

This Universe doth unfold,
What I need I am always told
With a willingness to let go
Of all the things I think I know

All the answers I need not find
The mysteries need not unwind
When stillness is, without the chatter
Answers? they no longer matter

Then I truly feel and know
That which is, which way to go
Listening to the inner voice
Only one way is, no real choice

I can release and clearly see
What this great life is teaching me
There is no right nor is there wrong
Just listen to my true heart song

When I follow the path that's mine
My inner light can brightly shine
Enormmous thanks for leading me,
Showing me, what life can be

Love and peace to Mother Earth
Who cares for me through each rebirth
And all the beings of Open Hand
Whose perfect plan is surely grand

Mere words cannot reveal
The love and joy I deeply feel
To "Boundless Love", my thanks I give
For presenting me this life to live

Om Shanti

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4JI1n4rvs8

Wow Fi! Life! What a conundrum.
Beautiful indeed. We are blessed.

Hey Fiona!

Awesome poem - I can't find words to justify my feelings!
We'll have to adopt it as an Openhand poem.

And the video link too - simply wonderful!

Thanks so much for sharing.

Much love

Chris
x

Hi Fiona

what a powerful poem - I can really resonate with it! It has a kind of completeness about it like a journey - explorations have been made, and by the end understanding has unfolded.
Thankyou for sharing - beautiful!

B

x

Thank you guys for your wonderful feedback. It certainly was a fun journey watching it unfold!

Chris, I don't think poem needs to be adopted by Open Hand, as it was born of Open Hand.

Much love and gratitude, Shanti

Starting over

On the crowded beach, I am a tiny grain of sand
Sculpted, shaped and polished by the sea’s hand
Resting here, one of the many, it’s easy to forget
We were uniquely formed, right from the outset

I see billowing clouds motion and beckon from afar
Come join us on a journey to remember who you are
Carried by the four winds across continents vast and wide
I rise up and over mountains with the senses as my guide

Soaring high over ocean and forest way below, fearlessly flying
I retrace my steps, distant memories are slowly crystallising
It seems a total blur, a magical fantasy beyond all realms and bounds
But I keep on moving, experiencing different sights and sounds

Eventually, the landscape starts to change before my excited eyes
I’m effortlessly floating to the ground, in awe of a beautiful sunrise
Zooming out, I realise that desert extends in every single direction
Surrounded by countless grains of sand, each created to perfection

Andy C

September 2009

I love the poem Andy - wonderful!

Thanks for sharing

Chris

This seems a big question, how can I know?
Plain answer? I don’t suppose so
Who am I? The answer’s not clear
There’s been so much that I hold dear
Straightforward is that which I am not
About this I could share quite a lot!
It’s not what I do, or how I may feel
Much deeper than this, lies that which is real

Searching the heart of the matter
Who I am needs no answer
A question created by the mind
Questioning mind I leave behind
Many aspects the mind tries to label
To merely watch, yes, I am able
Who I am is beyond comprehension
I let go and ease the tension

There seems an endless changing me,
True in each moment is who to be
Not the external role, I’ve been playing for years,
That was pretend, controlled by my fears
I open, surrender and I release
I ask the Universe, to please
In each moment, guide me as I go
Help me be present and go with the flow

What I need the world will show
I humbly stay open, ready to grow
Letting each moment arise
As it is, what’er the guise
Freedom in accepting not knowing
Not looking where am I going
In each moment to simply be
This is truly being “me”

- If there is a “me” to be

Ahhhhh. Deep sigh!
Manna for my heart.

Blessings

Chris

I've lived a million years
All in my heart
I've shed a million tears
All in my heart
It doesn't make sense
And yet here I am
It doesn't make sense
Make me a man

I've lived a million lives
All in my head
I've told a thousand lies
All in my head
It doesn't make sense
And yet here I am
It doesn't make sense
Wolf in a lamb

I've woke a thousand times
All in my bed
I've met a thousand whores
All in my head
It doesn't make sense
And then it does
It doesn't make sense
Descending from love

I've worn a thousand wounds
All in my heart
I've fought a thousand wars
All in my heart
It doesn't make sense
Take me back home
It doesn't make sense
To be alone

I've bought a thousand words
All in my head
I've faced a thousand dooms
All in my head
It doesn't make sense
Whom do I serve?
It doesn't make sense
Show me my worth

I've asked a million whys
All in my heart
Ive screamed out in the pain
Broken apart
It doesn't make sense
Go back to the start
It doesn't make sense
Lonely in parts

I've waited for too long
Or so it would seem
Ushered by the throng
Sleepwalking the dream
It doesn't make sense
Can't live a lie
It doesn't make sense
Now who am I?

I've had a million meals
When will I be full
I know now what is real
Yet here I am lulled
It doesn't make sense
Until it does
It doesn't make sense
Until it does

I've rattled in this cage
Again and again
I've bent a million bars
One by one
Then it makes sense
Standing in light
Then it makes sense
It will be alright

I've lived a billion years
All in my heart
I've shed a billion fears
All in my heart
Then it makes sense
Wonder so bright
Then it makes sense
It will be alright

I've lived a billion lives
All in my heart
I've loved a billion times
All in my heart
Then it makes sense
All in my heart
Then it makes sense
All in my heart