Trinity, I completely agree with your comments above - particularly since I have actually caught myself slipping back to a pattern that hasn't done me any good in the past, purely because it can feel 'comfortable'. Safe, with our demons eh?

These patterns (in my experience) feel like lessons that are on a constant loop if the lesson doesn't get learnt. So, the lesson is recycled and recycled until I realise what's happening.

But, as I've said I find myself slipping back into the old pattern because of it's comfort. Crazy isn't it? But, knowing that the cycle is there, how do you go about trying to break it? How do you go beyond it and free yourself? I guess, I feel inside that the answer is already there. To go within and look at why I behave why I do and by seeing and understanding that, comes the release. Except in times of weakness, I find myself going back to old behaviour patterns despite knowing all this!

Sometimes it just isn't easy...

What have you experienced of this or indeed, anyone else? I'd be really interested to see if I'm the only one that despite seeing and knowing, still goes back to the odd, old pattern. Like going back to 'worry beads' I guess.

Hi S,

One of the best techniques I've found for breaking patterns is to 'act before you think'. I call it the 'sudden rush of blood to the head'!

So you become aware of a pattern and hold the pattern in your awareness. Then invite the universe to help you break it. The universe 'wants' you to do so because the pattern pertains to an illusionary identity.

Then watch as the pattern arises but also watch for the synchronicity to guide you in the new direction. Follow the new direction at 'WHATEVER PERSONAL COST TO YOURSELF'.

Then watch the outcome. I guarantee it will be more wonderful than any previous 'quick fix' from the previous pattern.

Love

Chris

Yes, S, it is that 'better the devil you know than the devil you don't' scenario isn't it? Until we tire of that experience of course!

I have the odd going back too to relearn something past (usually at ever deeper levels) so you're not the only one S We are eternal students. I used to think that it was a malfunctioning of the brain (I mean why not just get it the first time round!?!!!), until I realised that running programmes was a 'normal' human behaviour. Who wants to be 'normal' though??? If that's normal, then it doesn't work for me!

Excellent advice above Chris.

Love
Trin
x

p.s. Liberation... thank you for the smileys you are an angel

My terminology is patterns rather than programmes, but it's the same thing. There are three points I'd make.

Firstly, stress has a lot to do with it. When you are stressed you fall back on previous behaviour as the whole psyche is overloaded. You can make changes in your environment to reduce stress, as one option. When this is hard to do, then at least understand that a lot of stress is self-induced by attachment to future outcomes or guilt over past events. Neither of these is productive, so if we can move to live more in the moment and be less attached, then less suffering will ensue.

Secondly, patterns can form cycles and networks. A cycle is where situation 1 induces pattern A which induces situation 2 which induces pattern B which induces situation 3 which induces pattern C which induces situation 1: so, we have a self-energized vicious circle of unsatisfactory actions. Further, in our life there may well be groups of intersecting cycles of patterns which form into a complex network (think of a Tube map). So one can sometimes appear to be on a crazy random journey through an endless maze of dysfunctional behaviours. Taking some time out to chart these pattern networks on a sheet of paper might be useful: then, find the weakest links and make change there first to break the cycles.

Thirdly, plan ahead. In some problem situations, you will be the initiator. For these, you have time and the opportunity to visualize different behaviour and a more successful outcome: do so. It's harder when someone else surprises you, as the programmed pattern tends to automatically appear as a kind of instinctive reaction. Retaining some cool is what one wishes to achieve, but it's not easy I admit.

Good luck!

Yes I see your analogy very clearly Liberation. Cycles linking up to form complex networks of behviours. They build like viral networks so someone can seem to have very sophistcated actions and yet these are all still patterns. Anything can spark them off from a chance comment, the taste of a particular type of food to even the weather for instance.

When they form the complex networks you describe, I call them 'filters'. So for example we all seem to have an inner child filter and a young adult filter. The inner child forms as a result of perceived lack of the unconditional love it felt in the womb.

In most cases, people tend to give love to children in order to get some kind of 'return' from them - its frequently the reason they have the child in the first place.

When the child doesn't receive the uncondtional love it had known, all kinds of complex behaviour patterns begin to arise in an attempt to get attention. If this inner child filter does unchecked, we find it can influence just about every decision we ever make having radical consequences on the life we manifest for oursleves.

The 'young adult filter' tends to kick off at puberty. Hormones tend to make the child rebellious and then protective of their inner child filter. There tends to be an over compensation for the perceived victimisation which can lead to obsessive, egoistic, (separated) self-serving behaviour.

To be fully free - flowing from the true self - these networks of patterns - filters - must be dissolved. Awareness is the key to their dissolution. So yes Liberation I totally agree with you that preparation can greatly help.

If you know you are going into and environment where your 'buttons are likely to be pushed', then being aware as the inner tightness begins to arise can help you make alternative choices from a place of inner stillness and centredness.

I've also found internal disassociation is very important too. In other words to be in the place of the observer of ourselves and even though buttons may start getting pushed, to be totally without need or desire for a particular outcome - this is paramount.

However, I also believe it is important not to over analyse one's own patterns. This can give greater energy to them. Instead I have often helped people through this particular meditation:

Begin by finding inner stillness through deep dolphin breathing (full body breathing in and out through the nose). Then project out from yourself both your inner child and young adult. Have them sit in front of you and facing you. Visualise them as clearly as you can and watch as their characteristics materialise. Then be absolutely clear that they are not you - disassociate yourself from them. Once you are clear you are not them, then begin to bring down loving light from higher consciousness. Watch your two projections bathing in this healing, comforting and loving light. Know that they are being healed. When the meditation is complete, draw the two projections back inside yourself and feel yourself complete and whole. In the days that follow, watch how and when your inner filters arise and seek to express alternative higher truths instead of the conditioned response of the filter.

Over time, the various inner filters will dissolve.