I spent the evening The Way of the Heart ended building a fire. It was primarily for a friend of mine, who I was staying with and who had a bad cold (she was lying under a duvet on a nearby sofa, resting). But as I fueled the fire with logs and scraps of wood, I realised that I was building it to nourish some other things too: the love that I shared with the members of our beautiful group; the love I felt for my 'twin flame' inside (this connection is getting stronger in recent weeks) and also to fuel the torch that I'm holding, along with many others, for humanity's ascension.

And as I thought of all this love and threw more fuel onto the fire, it burned and sparkled and chuckled more brightly and became a truly great fire.

I have always felt a kinship with fire - but more now than ever. I feel like I have been burnt to ash - several times - by the intense heat of my life and am now standing, transformed, at the centre of the flame.

My life has become extraordinary. New abilities and spiritual 'gifts' are unfolding to me each day, as I say 'yes' on a deeper level (though because of the ease with which they're unfolding, I think they're perhaps not new – just newly accessed!) Yesterday I was in a supermarket, looked up from the groceries I was carrying, caught a man's eye and a shaft of light passed like a bolt from his eyes to mine (or was it the other way round?) It was clear to me that I was to connect with him. And the day before, I was in the office of a client of mine, and found myself walking up the corridor following someone I had never met before and asking him if he wanted help making the teas. A bolt of light passed between our eyes – a kind of energetic blessing - and we were both changed as a result. We found ourselves in a state-of-grace conversation about the value of kindness – it turned out that he was in a spot of trouble in his life and I was able to offer help (and the name of an excellent book by Dr David Hamilton – Why Kindness is Good for You, a topic that was, not coincidentally, dear to his heart). Another moment of divine alchemy – but it's not base metal that is being transformed into gold here, it's something far more precious. And it's like in these moments of surrender to 'something greater', profound energetic shifts can take place and powerful alchemical transformations can take place that can change the very fabric of our beings and lives.

I am also finding that creatures and plants are communicating with me. Not verbally, but in their energy fields. Cats that I have never met before will warm unusually to me and come and sit beside me as if I am their dearest friend, and often put a paw on my lap as a silent acknowledgement of our connection. And we will be held, suspended, in a space of what I can only describe as unconditional love.

I am often in tears of gratitude and awe as a result of what is unfolding in my life. And my heart is sending out a cry to the universe, 'I'm ready now. I'm ready to begin'. I love this world, I love the beautiful people that live on it. I'm ready to stand up there and show my soul and to help create the heaven on earth that I've always seen in my inner eye.

To some extent, these kind of things have been happening to me all my life as a result of an early dedication I made to spirit in my life. But in isolated incidents. But now the flames of the fire are burning stronger and brighter and this is catalysing the process, in me and around me. The fire is sometimes in my heart and throat and I need to speak – I don't think about the words, they just come. And they are transformative words - and sometimes shockingly direct that they surprise even me! And sometimes I wake up with fire in my hands and need to write or do healing work until the feeling subsides.

All my life, at least since I was about 13, I've known (or hoped?) this time would come. I've prepared the way by building up structures (training in a number of complementary therapies, getting experience in group facilitation, learning to write and to edit...), but it is only now, with this latest awakening – it feels like I am 'graduating' on some level after 'lifetimes' of earnest application - that I find that I have something of true benefit to offer. Until these things can be transformed by the full light of the soul, on some level they are empty.

Sometimes I feel shaky as a result of what is happening. And I suppose that's one reason why I'm writing this. This path of ascension truly is a 'hero's journey' – not for the faint hearted. And sometimes I feel a desire to reach out to those who are also on the journey. It strengthens me somehow. Sometimes I reach out to connect. Sometimes just to say, 'hang on in there... it's worth it!' Or to offer a hand. Because changes in our soul and personality structure that come as a result of unfolding, though welcome, can be destabilising until we integrate them into our being. And it's good to have the connection with like minds. Because in my experience, not only does 'the darkest hour come before the dawn' but it's not so much 'the calm before the storm' as 'the storm before the calm'. You know that beautiful spiritual gifts are on their way to you when you're being tossed about on the stormiest of seas! (That reminds me, I need to share one of the most inspirational pieces of writing I have ever read with you – and will post it on Trinity's new 'More inspirational spiritual poetry' link now. It's by Clarissa Pinkola Estes and it's one of the most passionate and rousing and inspiring pieces of writing I have ever read. I'd love to hear whether you were as moved by it as I was when I first read it!)

If anyone feels moved to comment or connect (or collaborate!) as a result of reading what I've written, I'd love to hear from you.

With love and many blessings,
Tonya