I find it interesting that my situations are also somewhat connected to what goes in the forums here. Or maybe I'm responding to it in a certain way. Certain things clicked which made me be honest with my mother about something today. It was difficult. It took about 6 months for this specific thing to come to the front. She was also kind of waiting for the opening to arrive. I think these open secrets are the killer of human relations,where each parties know a certain thing but are hiding it. This doesn't happen intentionally most times. I think my rational mind was questioning authenticity of wanting to be honest - if it was really necessary ,that if im unnecessary creating disruptions. I cant certainly blame her or anyone for wanting to hide the true feeling because honestly only really starts with myself. But it is also easy to be open and honest with someone who are open and honest themselves. Openhand forums are a great place to start practicing openness and honesty.