So, I wrote this (on my way to work using Siri on my phone Friday morning after having seen the video) "I cannot believe how thrilled I am right now :-) every single morning I have been going to the website to view one of the videos or diaries.  I had already finished them and gone through them again , so this morning I thought I would go to YouTube to see what I could find… My subscription updated me that there was a new video… I watched it and I was enjoying it so much (really loving the content) and then I saw us, my beloved peeps from the New York intensive… then I saw myself dancing and didn’t cringe at the sight… As a matter of fact, I re-experienced the extreme joy that I felt when that was happening and I am filled with gratitude and love!!!!!"
After that I got to work and have been crazy busy since (in the most positive of ways:).  I only now had time to get on here to post this and read all of the posts above, which actually are quite synchronistic with my last few days.  After seeing the video I was thinking about how joyful the dancing has made me after meditation lately (since the release and joyous movement at the intensive in NY), but that doing it alone was not quite as fulfilling.  I had found a "conscious dance" group in Tacoma, but it takes me almost 2 hours to get there and another 2 to get back 6 days a week and I did not want to do it on Sunday.  I live in a city that is more in tune with spirituality than many in this area, so I looked online to see if they offered it here.  I found a session that began at 10:30 a.m. this morning.  I was running late and did not want to interrupt meditation and come in late, especially on my first time, and I was just about to divert to the gym to work out and dance alone again this evening when a song came on (it was in my play list, but not a song that I know...I am making audio vision board options and it was about dance, so it made its way into my music app) called ""Lose yourself to Dance".  I decided to let the Universe make the call and when I pulled up there were others still walking in and I was very excited at the opportunity to join.  There were over 100 people!!!!!  You would not believe the energy; I could literally see it everywhere visually and I was in joyous awe.  After the movement began I found myself dancing very differently than I do alone and found myself weaving in and out of the crowd dancing and not touching another soul (physically ;).  I felt wrapped in the energy all around me and then all of the sudden felt like I was choking, like I could not breathe at all and moved to the side near the fan to try and take a minute...it was then that I suddenly felt hot everywhere, my throat dried, my heart pounded, my stomach started burning and as it moved down the ailment behind it seemed to flow out like colors from my body.  The energy then rested in my base chakra and it felt like fire.  It felt very sexual and I almost succumbed to embarrassment when an adorable man with orange painted toenails said "are you ok?"  When I looked up I was smiling (I could feel it on my face, but it was not purposeful)...I only noticed when a large smile crossed his face and he said "I guess you are more than ok."  He then laughed, reached out his hand for me to grab (although it was said that we should not touch unless there was consent, I did not hesitate) and he led me to the middle of the crowd.  Suddenly we were dancing as if we were an artistic version of the music; I felt so utterly alive.  For a second I felt that it was odd because I was feeling more masculine and his energy was more feminine, but the balance was so perfect I did not think on it long.  The music flowed from one song to another and we continued without end for over an hour.  I was completely disheveled, sweaty, black mascara under my eyes and utterly on fire with love.  The most wonderful thing about it is that my new friend has a boyfriend whom is also a dancer and they have a traveling conscious dance group!  When it was all over we decided to hang out at the park next to the dance place and the day was exquisite!  The sun felt different on my skin and the love pouring from us was noticeable to others, some who joined us in conversation and so many amazing things are coming of this union; everything that I had been hoping for my community just spontaneously combusted into a mushroom cloud confetti of unity and love.  I am overwhelmed with joy, understanding the kundalini...not sure why my pain did not last long or even seem real for some reason...still observing the events in my mind as I write this.  

I guess the point of my post is that I can completely understand all of what you are sharing and I am grateful for the insight.  The Open experience has been the best thing that ever happened to me and I am filled with abundant gratitude!  I used to think that I could not decide what my favorite thing in the "whole world" (lol, my childhood statement of enchantment) was, but it was usually going to either be music or dance...I guess it is an entwined and simultaneous exploration of meditation/music/dance and a freedom of expression that I never knew could exist for me...I am sending the energy I raise to all of you lovelies and I hope that your exploration continues to move you through your ecstatic journey...even then pain is worth it and knowing that it will come again is not even scary, it is delightful :)

With eternal love to the highest in each of us,

Aphroheidi

"This light of mine is your reflection"