Thank you for the reflection Open. What jumped out most for me was 'self-sabotage' and it kept me busy the past few days. I tend to easily see situations in a black and white way, it's either this or that, which causes me to miss the truth behind a distortion. For example lately I've been feeling to change some circumstances in my life (work, living space) in the process of letting go of my old relationship, but from a place 'should's' - feeling shame about how things are now (dependency), although this comes from fear of how others might judge my situation, as I judge it myself. Another part of me is actually okay with how it is, but then I quickly become too comfortable and lazy. I switch back and forth between forcing change - which doesn't work out - and then do nothing: self-sabotage. I realise the feeling to change things and take action is right, but not from a place of shame and judgement. 

Got some reflections the past week in the form of internet not working, probably the universe telling me to disconnect to connect. And the keyboard app on my phone that kept crashing, which made me unable to type anything. I needed to 'empty the cache' for it to start working again, hehe. So I'm spending more time in meditation and also bowing into the situations and feelings that cause me to switch to the black and white thinking, feel that really helps.