Hello Open and everyone on Openhand,

I am learning to come in peace about my coming and going emotions, thoughts from my ego, and family/childhood programmings. 2019 has been a bumpy but a wonderful year. There is a noticeable increase in moments where I am confronted with old thought patterns and emotional blockages, but I am very grateful for them. Through these moments, I am slowly but surely letting the patterns and blockages go, and even though there are days where I am not feeling like myself, I am very content. I know everything is/will be alright, and I am very very very hopeful and excited for what this path is going to bring ('good' and 'bad'). 

Recently, I have been feeling as if living in a matrix. It is a subtle, background-feeling that I can't quite put into words. I've always been an 'observer' of life, but I've been thinking maybe it's detachment. It's a weird feeling especially when I'm interacting with others because I already kinda know what they're going to say or what they have on their minds. 

Overall, I have been feeling a lot of unconditional love, great joy and hopefulness. There are frustrations now and then, but I try to embrace them all and let it go :) 

Thank you for this opportunity, Open! My goal for this year is to find/create a group where I can share my spiritual journey and inspire others. 

Risa