In reply to by Open

Testing this out. Yesterday had a couple minor (but still so meaningful) breakthroughs after falling back into my old control habits, and some challenging news. The usual fear reactions accompanied by the spoiled-toddler reactions of not getting my way, but then I remembered surrender. And made a conscious choice that that was what I would do.Just let it be. Sure things are getting harder but they won't stay that way, and I have learned by now struggling just makes it worse. And have found enough soul frags to see just how precious the struggle can be if approached from a place of trust and acceptance. And then I spoke up for myself against a particularly demanding control freak in a calm no-nonsense way; usually I'd bite my tongue and then stew, my poor heart and soul betrayed again. And I felt lighter and liberated. I would rather face her narcissistic rage than betray myself and my truth. A victory for me and it flowed authentically because I had made the choice to surrender. And then synchronicities: the sudden burst of joyous laughter from a child sledding nearby that brought a giggle to my lips. The four geese flying into the sunset, the plane that flew right over where I was standing...things are shifting and I'm getting less afraid of the unknown, and maybe even a little excited for the adventure that awaits! Still have lots of work; testing the waters I find I'm still not ready to open to people yet but I will start dipping my toes in the water...YAY!!! 💜💜💜