Hi Maha,

I felt to connect with you as I hear your commitment ringing loud and clear and the mammoth efforts you have made to change your way of being. Maybe there is a little softening into your new ways that could be accomplished to dissolve a bit of the "efforting". It takes commitment and application for sure, but when that is a little over-egged it becomes efforting, the spiritual path has to be walked not sprinted! Maybe you could invite a softening and sense of relaxation into your life and take some time to blossom. :-)

Take some time to follow your joys and let the fears and worries fall away would be my suggestion at this point.

WIth love,