Dear Jen,

If it’s any source of comfort, I’m right there with you! As I move into the preparations for the Divinicus course, it’s with a sense of leaving everything I ever knew and found support and comfort in, behind me. Due to current family circumstances, I’m even leaving with the feeling of completely abandoning my children (especially my 2-year old son) when they need me the most. 

When going to Bruge, I went with the excitement and confidence of a child/teenager, but this time I go with a deeper sense of maturity and humility in knowing that the death of the ego is NO JOKE. If you think you can tuck some little shady or attached part of you away in some nook or cranny of your consciousness, thinking it may go by unnoticed - think again! There is no escape. No compromise. You either (let) go all the way or you don’t!

It will be ok, Jen. You’re in a good place. And you’re not alone. I’m glad to see you’ve gotten in touch with the RAGE. I sensed that in you back in the fall when we had that exchange in our Circle of Angels. I believe I mentioned it in one of my posts to you. There was also a dream you talked about then. I think it was something about you being on the Second floor of your childhood home and not being able to go down to the bottom floor. Sound familiar? I didn’t say anything then but I felt this dream was connected to the hidden rage, the rage somehow being on the bottom floor but without a staircase to reach it. Disconnected somehow. The two different floors resonated with me as the two lowest chakras - the second (emotional) and the base. And the base was cut off, not accessible for some reason...

I don’t know why I feel to tell you this now, I just do. See if anything resonates with you.

 

It will be OK.

 

I love you and I will see you very very soon! ❤️

 

Anastasia