Hi Thomas,

You said:

 

 The same with the refusal of fully unfolding the angelic wings and the subsequent pain in the back, where they are attached - that's because I make myself smaller than I actually am. My ego (or is it really the soul?) prefers to stay small and unimportant, that's safer. Is that being afraid of arrogance? Being scared that my future success will go to my head? I have the idea that i've had great power in another life and did not use it in a responsible way, costing me my life. Now there is the avoidance and lack of acceptance of my true self with all its powers.

 

I can certainly relate to this. I have exactly the same pain in the back and have had the same explorations around using the power I have. To your question about whether it's the ego or the soul that prefers to stay small and unimportant - I would reflect to you that perhaps you can find both in this. If you're attached to this and it's bringing up tightness and fear to unfold your wings then sure, that's something we could call ego and can be let go of. However, I would say there's also a deeper truth behind it. Perhaps you can explore expressing your power while still remaining humble? Be careful with this because 'being humble' can also become an ego identity. But if you can drop the tightness around being in your power, and any need for approval from others, then perhaps being humble will arise naturally. 

Something else to explore would be to ask the question, 'what is your natural expression?' and then, 'if this is expression arises naturally, without being forced, then what need would you have to either elevate yourself or put yourself down?'

If I may also share a brief article on responsibility I wrote some time ago. I hope it helps: http://www.comebacktothesource.com/articles/are-you-responsible-for-other-peoples-suffering

Best wishes,

Richard