After what I wrote earlier this week about falling sick after coming back from Africa, the cold symptoms meanwhile mostly cleared up relatively quickly. But the urinary infection that I am hoping to clear without antibiotics is still there and seems to be getting worse, today I spend more time on than off the toilet. And other than the constant urge to pee, since today I am having these stabbing pains around my pubic bone. 

I always get very challenged by physical discomfort and find it very hard to 'surrender' to and be ok with it. Usually all my attention becomes focused on finding a way to resolve the discomfort. So also in this case I have already spend a fortune on natural supplements for urinary infections and am spending a lot of my time browsing the internet for information on how to cure urinary infections naturally. While in the back of my mind I am already busy deciding how long I am going to let it simmer on before consulting a doctor, who is probably going to prescribe antibiotics, and whether I am willing to take the antibiotics or not. 

At the same time, my mind gets busy analysing what the underlying reason for getting the urinary infection could be, but easily gets wound up in that. Is there some karma here that needs to be processed? Is there an overkill of unprocessed emotions passing through my bladder causing the infection? Does it have something to do with loosing control (over when to pee)? etc. etc. 

I know all of this doesn't necessarily help, but I guess it distracts me from the discomfort. I am doing my best to stay and be ok with it, but finding it very hard not to get attached to the need for it to go away and to understand why I manifested this! 

If anyone has any guidance on how to work with the manifestation of illness or infections at a deeper level and how to become more surrendered with it, I would very much appreciate.....