Guidance please

Hi Open,

Wondering if I can ask you about something please.

I did the Kiama 5 Gateways Retreat. Had some things shifting and started feeling better after the unattached of one entity....then revisited old ground and.took some back wards steps.

I have been working with an American Indian Shaman here - a few sweat lodges and spent a couple of days with him. Had some powerful healing and massive purging.

I am starting to feel myself again (which is great) but there's something in me which feels amiss.
I'm unsure if it's fear of the unknown and being free of the entities (loneliness)and I am.sabotaging myself or that this is not the way for me and there are some reasons for my caution.

I guess I am desperate for this to end and recently feel there's really not much left in me and don't want to mess it up.

Wondering what if you could give your honest opinion please Open.

Blessings,
Jennaya

Was trying to write this as an email but can't seem to get it through...

Comments

Hi Jennaya,

It's lovely to hear from you - greetings :-)

Firstly let me begin by saying you can't 'mess anything up'. Choices are made as a direct result of your inner configuration of consciousness. If something needs to be explored, it will be. You'll create exactly what you need to learn, evolve and grow through.

That said, you have some kind of concern which has brought you here. So your soul has been drawn for a reflection. What might that be?

The words 'healing and massive purging' stood out for me (the energy of them was spiked, through the ether, in my consciousness). Are you being purged by someone else? Only your own soul can truly purge you. No true healing can be done without self realisation - without the soul realising its own reality and realigning/reintegrating inside.

A healer can take away energy, which will make you feel good for a while. But unless the soul has been self-empowered through the process, then the original condition that led to the disharmony is not yet 'fixed' and could gather similar energy again. It could return, although in a different guise.

That's why in the Openhand work, we guide people into release of their own energy AFTER self realisation. So if you recall, in the course sessions, I would be asking people what they're feeling, where, and why do they think the blockage (which could be an entity and implant) is there? Then we'd use intuitive questioning to get to the unconscious blind spot through which the entity might be invading ones space.

Through assisted self-realisation, you make the unconscious - conscious.

Upon which, any energy blockage can then be ejected and not return.

There is no short-cut to self-realisation. And it is 'self' realisation. One realising oneself. You can get good mirrors - catalysts - that speed the process yes. But the inner work must be done by you.

No doubt the shaman was helping you self realise to some degree - perhaps by reminding you of some of your own frequencies. But perhaps now is the time for you to focus on your own inner work in your own space - maybe the healer was taking on too much, and thus inadvertently taking some of your own power?

You could ask for an Openhand Facilitator. They are trained to support the self-realisation of those they work with. None of them would be removing energy without that self-empowerment process happening first.

If you'd like me to put you in touch with someone appropriate, do let me know.

With love

Open *give_rose*

Hi Open,

Thank you for that.

I feel like I am quite aware of the blockage/characteristics....though perhaps more so at the intellectual level,

Most of this process has been about not giving my power away to people, particularly men. It confronts me on a daily basis. Sometimes it's almost comical!

I guess under that is the thing which causes it - longing for father energy and generally fearing rejection. And where the healing needs to be.

I was about to say that I can't feel into it because of entity interference.....perhaps more so allowing it to avoid feeling what I haven't yet...
Self-honesty is still progressing....

Inner Work.....yes .....may need to sit some time with this.

I have had my guides helping me throughout much of this.

They've showed me the nature of some things which are relevant to this experience, helped me during attacks, kept me in a state of peace when it got too much and showed me the best way to deal with it.

I can't feel them, tune in or get anything from them at the moment.
Do they step out at a certain point?
Unsure if it's me somehow pushing them away or whether it's them saying it's time for me to be less reliant.

Thank you for the Facilitator suggestion, think I will leave it for the moment. Need to do some settling within me.

With much love and gratitude,
Jennaya

Hi Jennaya,

You're definitely exploring this deeply - so fear not, the answers will surely come.

You said...

    "I can't feel them (my guides), tune in or get anything from them at the moment.
    Do they step out at a certain point?

This is a classic: when you think you need your guides most of all, they go quiet!

What are they saying?

They want you to go deeper still - to self empower.

There'll be conflicting vibrations that you're touching but can't fully see. What does the neediness of a paternal figure do inside? Does it cause a blind spot - a veil?

I think you're being encouraged to feel through this veil. It'll likely be where any entities come in on. So work to bring your attention into that. Especially in the company of men.

Namaste

Open

Hi Open,

Thank you. For your positivity and your way.
It really helps to remember to trust the self and the universe..

Much love,
Jennaya

I guess this continued from the above with first interactions with a Shaman. Is good to re-read. I feel much had been unearthed and happened since then.

I'm experiencing ongoing interference from this Shaman. I'm not sure if the details are helpful....but my space is being violated. I think he enters my body [or perhaps the animal medicine he uses]. I feel angry, repulsed, sad and also powerless within it.

Sometimes I manage to get it/him out. It then either becomes an energy war or if I can't hold it; It enters. I feel dumbed down, thoughts quelled, thoughts/feeling strongly projected and entity stuff really increases as I exit my body. When I connect with my higher self/the Divine this is being severed, is also similar with Openhand energy. I feel the intent is to disconnect me from the Divine and have me plugged into something else.
For a couple of days there was a really strong input of “you’re with me now and not the Openhand community”. It was alarming strong and although I could sense external input was hard to break.
Presently the intensity and aggressiveness has eased and what is being input now is “having this energy is ok, just relax into it”.

General interference and external attacks has been ongoing since I decided not to do any more work there and let him know - but for the past week its turned and feels like someone trying to possess. It is relentless.
I am not sure as to why the sudden turn and intensity. I had recently unconsciously expressed to someone negativity/resentment around/about his ways; I also recently spent a week on a sailing boat and after I think perhaps my energy field was weaker for various reasons and/or maybe something to do with me trying to tap into my sexual energy after some time. As I write this I feel there may be something in the latter...feeling uncomfortable and some fear here.

Some time ago I received guidance to have compassion for him. I do feel for the pain which causes this. I know and feel what is beneath this behaviour.

The other guidance was a reminder of a book about everyone playing parts for each other [especially the ones who challenge us] and how the they'll be the "first people we meet in heaven."

I feel the truths of both the above but am finding if I open at all with any form of compassion, it is an opening for entry [I think through the heart.]

I have been exploring with an Openhand facilitator quite a bit in the past week. It's better when there with her and with the Openhand energy but when I feel his energy, fear kicks in and it cycles again.

There's some karmic stuff which has come up around all this. At the moment, I'm not sure that these details really are useful....I guess I'm just looking for any guidance around all this please, I'm not handling this that well and wish to find a way to close this chapter.

It too makes me really appreciate you all. Thank you.