Help!

Hi There,

Im after some advice. Ive thought Id become pretty good at noticing when I was projecting judgement onto other people, and figuring out what I needed to heal in myself, but recently Ive come up against a challenge I can't seem to get through and its really knocking my vibrations down! I live in the countryside next to a farm that my family owned for generations. My mum sold it when I was a teenager, and me and my siblings were all gutted, but I thought I'd gotten over it. For the last 20 years a nice couple lived there and they loved the wildlife and took care of everything, which was great. A few months ago it changed hands. I welcomed the new owners-my new neighbours, and it turns out the lady who now lives there works in the same circles as me, and we had a lot in common and I really liked her, until a couple of weekends ago. I walked down there to see a bunch of people with guns and dogs ploughing through the gorgeous woodland full of wildlife shooting away making a massive noise, shouting with dogs barking-terrifying everything. This has been going on every weekend-right now I can hear the guns outside my window and I just feel so gutted that they could ruin such a beautiful ecosystem like that. Its breaking my heart and Im filled with judgement for them for allowing this-and fear for the world in general, and our beautiful wildlife they is getting attacked from all angles. What do I do? Inside me I mean? I know this is making me face something inside myself... I can't get past the judgement I have for these people at the moment but I really want to get past it. Its not helping anything me feeling like this. Any advice would be very welcome! Thank you for reading Xx

Comments

After reflecting on this issue a bit more... First of all, Im realising that Im probably struggling with this because Im not accepting the new reality-as shitty as it is (my special place and its creature inhabitants being violated) this is the new reality for now. Things have changed, I can't control it, so I have to accept it. Ive gone and read through a few posts about the black snake energy, and how Open-you talk about feeling into it at its level, to transmute it. Im definitely getting a lot of pain being very triggered all at once. I guess one way of looking at this is that it is an opportunity to feel through and transmute a whole lot of dark energy in one go! Its been a while since Ive had to deal with unpleasantness on this scale, but Ive coped with worse (extreme heartbreak) and there will be worse to come (the impending collapse of nature as we know it and civilisation!!) so Id better get to it!

My second main thought on it all is that although being mainly vegetarian, I have been falling off the wagon sometimes, and occasionally eating meat. Ive been taking the attitude that I don't want to do anything out of rigid dogma, and want to instead just notice how I feel when I eat meat, what comes up for me, and  see what happens. Maybe this is the universe sending me a reflection of animal suffering. Maybe this is my call to really engage with not eating animal products. 

I'd still really appreciate any thoughts and advice you may have on this! I hope you don't give me a hard time for the meat eating! I know it is wrong. I think we will look back on the times when we ate animals in a similar way to how we look back at slavery-with disbelief that it was normal. Im aware Im transitioning - like humanity is. I want this transition to be solid and real-not done because of peer pressure, or because I feel that that is what I should do, or because 'thats what spiritual people do'... I hope you can understand this. 

Maybe this is what's going on for my neighbours too. Hopefully they will also notice that it doesn't feel very nice letting these horrible pheasant shooters on their land. Maybe they will also transition to a better more harmonious way. Here's hoping!

Faye

Dear Faye,

Lots of love first. The picture that you paint of where you live ( such a slice of paradise) ,I deeply empathize with your pain. Only when one feels deep love ,can one of course feel the ripped apart feeling that you are describing .

In my life I have come to recognize is that the quickest way to induce change in other people ( if they will ever be ready ) is to plant the seeds of a higher perspective whilst being deeply connected to them . The latter part tends to be my challenge as well. Judgement naturally comes in the way of that. ( How could they ,why can't they see what they are doing etc.) I have come to recognize though that unconsciousness that permeates pretty much everything on this planet is what I want to disown hence my judgement. 

It is not easy . I am in such a situation currently as well. And yet when I connect deeply with my own inability to see the humanity in another ( albeit unconscious) it is often because there is something deep within that needs connection. Softening into that mental wall I have built of me vs them or good vs bad tends to open a small shaft of light that shows the way. Often I find that when I have completely surrendered to all outcomes ( in your case the loss of your beautiful environment ) without loosing connection with all that you feel within ,and connection with those ' responsible ' without ,things change drastically . 

Just felt like sharing . I love what you say about how we each will have to do this on a planet sized scale ! Even in India right now we are feeling the effects of the polar vortex . 

Lots of love ,

Megha 

 

Hi Faye - no one's going to give you a hard time here - yes, it can be challenging to switch from meat eating, especially since human DNA has been configured to consume it. Yes, awareness is always the key and not judging oneself. By bringing deep awareness into the abode of the soul, it's important to inquire what your true nature really is? And then to progresively express this, bringing it into all aspects of our lives - diet being especially important, since what we consume, in a way, becomes our consciousness (or at least an element of it).

So my encouragement is to keep inquiring into the deepest levels of inner compassion, without self-judgment, and then to allow choices to flow naturally from there.

In loving support

Open HeartPraying Emoji

Thanks both of you-Megha and Open for taking the time to reply. I will take your advice on board. Megha-your suggestion is probably going to be the hardest thing to do, but I will try my best! I've been completely taken by surprise by how much this has gotten to me. I walked down there today to find suspicious bits of wire and beer cans next to the Badger sets... I get a really bad feeling about that. I just feel so powerless! It's stopping me sleeping properly, and the stress is making me feel ill. Im starting to think I wont be able to stay here and watch it happen if this is a sign of the way things are going. But Im also thinking I will have to talk to these people, especially as I made friends with them before the shooting started. I will honour their right to choose what to do with them being the landowners, but I will also be honest about how Im worried and how its making me feel. At least then Ive expressed myself. There is a chance that Im getting all worked up about nothing! Im reading hat Ive written and I can see how Im getting caught up in the external world here. Im also meditating twice a day and feeling my pain, and going deep with it-trying to feel it and express it. Not sure if there's some kind of funny karma thing going on here too. Not sure where to start with that if so. I don't know if Ive experienced any hardcore past life karma yet. Maybe this is it? Anyways I'll just keep doing what Im doing, and I appreciate being able to share on here. 

Megha-sending love to you in India. I hope your coping OK through it all. Im in deep admiration for your ability to be able to stay lovingly connected with your neighbours-I will definitely try and follow your inspiring lead. 

Open-your teachings continue to be an inspiration. Ive been off the Openhand radar for a while. Its funny-as soon as things get hard this is my first port of call! Your simple but effective message really does work wonders -especially when times get tough. 

Faye

Hi Faye,

Ah I feel for you in that one - I know how connected you are with the land up there.

From your sharing above it sounds like not only are you feeling the impact of the hunting and disrespect of the land, but also the fact that you felt a connection with them to begin with. That can be especially impactful when you see a mirror of part of your identity in them - like seeing a part of yourself and then realising that it's not what you thought it was.

So perhaps to go deeper into your processing you could explore:

  1. The sense of betrayal
  2. The feeling of being violated

I wish you the best with it - let us know how it goes if you feel to do so.

Much love

Rich

Hi Rich,

 

Thanks for your thoughts. I have been investigating those feelings! Its funny because this week the activities in the physical world got even worse-I saw evidence of badger baiting on Tuesday, then on Wednesday the fox hunt turned up  and out of my bedroom window I watched about 30 hounds tear a Hare to pieces in the field next to me. Ive felt traumatised ever since, and home doesn't feel like home anymore.

Im afraid I got all caught up in the 3D world in the ensuing days. Ive been writing to my MP, and on the local facebook group to try and raise awareness that this is happening. Most people feel like I do, but of course there are some very nasty bad eggs directing their poison at me. The police have done absolutely nothing, and haven't even called me baxck despite this being illegal. So this week I experienced my local ecosystem getting consistently attacked and violated, and also experienced what its like to stick my neck out for something and experience the negative backlash which isn't pleasant.

It feels like something is going on in the ether-i don't think its an accident that in less than 2 weeks my world has gone from being happy settled and calm to being turned upside down! So I guess now its my job to dig deep and feel the feelings and express and release. Maybe this is a wake up call to a period of change. Thanks for the opportunity to share on here.

Faye X