Missing something...

Feeling like a part of me is missing... There is a deep aching like a giant hole in the center of my chest. I know I am missing something... My mind says it's that I lack an essential quality, that I am flawed and not ever going to transcend my karma. This feels very much like truth getting caught in a distorted mental pattern and I feel beyond that stream of thoughts. I stay with the feeling... Though acknowledge the pattern. Synchronistically I spent too much time in the sun and burnt my entire chest....had to coat it with some sticky aloe and it reminded me of the icky sensation of being a child and having goo spread all over my chest to have EKGs done for a physical hole in my heart. Dreams have been disturbing... I am in a house and I am feeling energy in the house and I am moving at super speed through the rooms in the house.... Not walking, just arriving. There is a room that terrifies me that I burst from in fear because I feel and see the presence of two young girls who resemble me but are children... And they are dead and I am hyperventilating in their presence... Waking in a very strange energetic space... Fuzzy and heavy and not quite awake or fully in my body. Is this what I am missing? Aspects of the inner child to be integrated? Or something else?

Comments

Did some soul motion last night and paying deeper attention to a a sense of being in the body all the time... Staying open and without expectation on events. Just watching and seeing how I am shown what this is for. It helps to write about it as it gives it attention. Dreamt last night of a huge rabbit that let me pick it up and it hugged me and I felt a deep sense of connection. There was also a dream in which a woman was trying to get in my car and I was pushing her out. I am seeing some fear around fully embracing the expression of the feminine... Working with it and approaching with courage the circumstances where I hold back and inching forward inch by awkward inch. Last night I felt drawn to sit with a candle and just be with the flame...as focus would spread out taking in the entire space the flame and it's counterpart in reflection were dancing but not ever quite meeting. I trust this will all keep unfolding <3

Hi Jen,

The first experience is clearly a karmic past life regression. You don't need to know the details, just work into and through the feelings that come up.

The rabbit is saying "face your fears". Then time to dance with your twin flame, through the experience of life. Something like this.

Keep delving, keep unravelling. These are deep spiritual experiences

Open *OK*

Thank you for the support Open...I am staying with it all in an open way... Working with the feelings and the mirror...there is really nothing quite like unravelling in this way... Far deeper than any intellectual meanderings. <3

It has suddenly become very clear to me that it is time for a new vehicle...the one I have, I synchronistically acquired when I first started to awake to a new way of being. This vehicle has been reliable and carried me a long distance and I was sure I would just keep driving it until it died...just totally ok with it...tuning it up as it had issues...feeling if I could work with it, it could just keep right on going. Well, with peeling seats, broken a/c, blown out speakers, doors that won't open and shut...It seems I have reached the point of action. I am ready for a new vehicle and I am curious what this is reflecting in the soul's expression...infinite possibilities, some I am not so comfortable with - and working to not figure it out or steer the ship in a mind-lead way. Open to change...<3 Jen

Awesome - beautiful when these blaring synchronicities happen. And why do they happen? Why so loud? Exactly because you're made the commitment to following the path toward realignment.

I'd say you're in a gateway. The old vehicle wishes to be disposed of and a new one is to replace it. It's the old way of being in the world that wants to go.

How exciting!

Open *OK*