Hi Open,

Thank you for the reply. I'll try and explain what 'transitional identity and shape-shifting' means to me. Although I'm not sure if that's what Reka also meant.

Please forgive me for the rather long reply - but I thought that providing some background might help.

I recognize that my true identity (my Inner Being) is very different from what is manifesting as my person as thoughts, behavior patterns, beliefs and actions in this 3D space. These make me very uncomfortable because they feel like not-me making it very difficult to express my authentic being. It feels like patterns I have somehow absorbed from my environment. I have felt this way for much of my life. I made several futile attempts to dissolve these patterns and move towards a more authentic state of being but could not. It felt like there were strong energies pulling me into the 3D space and keeping the patterns intact.

At one point, possibly from exhaustion, I stopped trying. Before I knew what was happening I got pulled into the matrix and actually spend a great many years in there. I felt a sense of oppressed relaxation but the relaxation was desperately needed and I ignored the 'oppressed' part. According to the IChing my mistake was "getting accustomed to the abyss (the matrix)."

What happened after that was a series of extremely painful events that showed me all the places where I had become accustomed to the matrix. I have been trying once again to come back to a state of authentic being, but the habitual patterns feel like a solid core on top of myself that has its own momentum. It also obscures the true state of being.

Sometime back I heard an audio program about Shamanic dreaming and how we have a dream body which exists in a different reality. I also learned that we can assume any shape or identity in our imagination and exploring that identity could have a healing effect.

Since my true self, feels obscured by an outer layer, I cannot imagine what authentic being would feel like. So I take my present 3D identity (thought and habit patterns), and try to imagine something that might be closer to the truth.I feel this helps me dissolve unhealthy patterns and move somewhat in the direction of a healthy state. However, I do this rather randomly (because the gap feels so wide that I am usually moving all over the place) and Reka's post made me wonder if there might be a better way of imagining myself in different forms/identities (shape-shifting) and exploring what that state of being might be in order to dissolve the unhealthy patterns and move towards my true self.

I am not sure if I have been able to explain properly - my apologies if it's confusing

Thanks Parag