Hi Open, thanks for the explanation. Considering we have never met (in this life anyway), you are right on the button with your assessment of my karmic situation. I believe the four previous incarnations I referred to may have had a genetic connection to my present life - the last one certainly did as I shared memories with my maternal grandfather as a small child (2 or 3 years old), the things I said convinced my mother that I was the reincarnation of her father (the drunken ex policeman) who had died about a year before I was born. The "anti" all forms of authority and claiming soul sovereignty in this incarnation was a very insightful assessment - spot on. The continuous soul evolution makes a bit more sense to me now as I see how the urges, desires and addictions I have experienced in this life do relate to my past life (lives) actions and I have used shamanic recapitulation to negate some of the negative actions I have indulged in over the last 60 years to hopefully assist my evolution - but, hey - this is a long rocky road with no map to show you where you are going or when you are off the track, so you can understand my frustration and the feeling that it is all pointless when I ask myself "why is my life the way it is?". Physical death will be an interesting experience (maybe?) because I don't know if my previous incarnations were the choice of my soul or the choice of the opposing consciousness of the simulation. How does one avoid the harvesting? Especially if one leaves the body in an unconscious state, which is the common occurrence these days. More food for my over active thinking mind - I can't help it lol.

Love, Shantiram