Hi Grant,

What a big journey you have been in the last few months. :-) It's great that you can feel your soul yearning for freedom.

I thought I'd share some of the things I've known other guys around your age get into which has really helped them unfold more of themselves. It may even be that you could agree to work stuff like this in as part of a an imaginative home school program that was much more open than a school program.

You seem to get a lot from being in nature, so look for things in your locality you could get involved in. My nephew has done lots of volunteering for woodland trusts and nature trusts and in doing so has learnt lots of skills like hedge laying, stone walling, path and step making, planting trees and woodland crafts. He also got really into cycling which helped him get fit, be really in tune with himself, the bike, the weather, road conditions etc etc His awareness and his sensitivity developed on many levels. Then there's things like camping, or do you have a garden? Another young friend of mine started off planting veg in the family garden, then did the "woofing" that Chris mentioned. After taking a year out of school, he went back to college and found a gardening group nearby where he volunteered, they were so appreciative of his help they've just paid for him to do a permaculture course.

Have you any interests in music or art? Are there any groups you could join for creative self expression? Maybe these things/sport/ martial arts and spending time in nature could bring about massive changes in how you feel about your situation and really give a sense of liberation for your soul.

Watch out for some new avenues for all that heartfelt energy you have to be expressed!

Sending you lots of warm wishes on your journey.
Lesley