Sam you have quite the polarity in your life right now. I can fully empathize with your situation as I've been there. If you choose to not follow your own path it can be really easy to hold strong resentment toward your partner and not even know it until it just erupts to the surface. The best way to help someone grow is to plant little seeds in the form of the right Questions to get them thinking. Then sit back and be patient in time they will draw their own conclusions and grow as they need to. You cannot change them directly to any lasting degree I tried this when I was younger and it becomes an ugly control game very quickly!! The thing about Unconditional Love is that it is without judgement. This is not easy for the human mind and what we are taught is our heart. But I believe that your heart has nothing to do with Romance or your partner it is your connection to your higher self that is truly your heart. It is a SOLO JOURNEY!!! That does not mean that you have to live alone just that we are each our own independent person. My advice is to write your partner a letter that way you can collect your thoughts at your own pace and be more sure that you are speaking from your heart.
Eddie