That's super helpful! Thank you !

This number 5 is incredibly interesting to me as that has typically been my experience at gatherings. It feels like the volume is turned up 1000 on the existing tendency toward perfectionism and fear of being ridiculed. This makes everything feel so intense and tends to feel like I am disconnected from my senses and my voice...the feeling is of loud drum just beating inside me and blasting out anything else - especially felt through the ears so that I can't hear things or understand them. The ears are also the first place I felt a connection to the soul...the first time I meditated and connected to an inner sound that seemed to be everywhere and spiraled upward and downward.

This is a key piece for me to realize...how these already challenging pieces (due to karma/conditioning) can be exacerbated through energetic interference.

For a long time I have felt that acknowledging this interference is an avoidance of what is already karmically here ...but I see how both are true - the karma needs to be worked through but also awareness of the influences that exacerbate these experiences is supportive.

Thank you! Jen