Hi Open and Michele,

I haven't seen his April fools video but I was watching one of his live broadcasts a couple days ago and although i was distracted being in a conversation at the time, I caught enough of his response to a question about whether the world was going to end and paraphrasing he said something along the lines of "No the world's not going to end, people who say that are those that are avoiding their own inner work and need the end of the world because they can't/won't face themselves" if you can believe it! He also said that he hasn't come across any scientific data that would suggest it but I don't think he's actually looking. I get it though, he's just not ready to face it. There are days, coming from my current level of consciousness of course, and especially when I'm tired and not feeling well, that I rail against it; I wonder why it has to be that way, why can't the world just awaken and evolve and get better collectively, and we stay and live here in paradise instead of all the pain that is coming? But acceptance, facing reality and that this isn't fairy tale land is one of the lessons I'm still learning. After all, we created it. Let ourselves get duped and let our hungers get the better of us. But that still doesn't change the fact that this is a natural cycle that would happen regardless of our level of consciousness, and that awakening is about using that cycle to evolve. I still wonder if I'm ready or even want Homo Divinicus yet. Some days I do, some days I don't. Want it to stay the same just get better, fairer, easier. Even more doubtful I'd be ready for Spiritus Divinicus, to make my own words. Maybe I need a couple more rides on the wheel to help me let go? I'm still attached and finding it so hard to connect internally. Even connecting to Sol, Avalonia and the core feels so cut off, probably because of Nikki's insights about the blocking. Patience and perseverance are also lessons I'm still learning though, and hopefully when I'm down the path some more, maybe I'll see things differently. I still want to give it a chance because I know on some level that going back is not the answer. But I accept that sometimes to get an arrow aloft it has to be pulled back so we'll see, but I hope I can find the strength to push through. It just feels like one step forward, ten back. Not giving up yet though, just disillusioned. Thanks, barb