Thank you Open!

Over the last few days I have been noticing the urge to rely/depend on others for things I can do myself...down to some of the silliest tasks...a reflection of what has happened on a larger scale. I continuously notice the pattern you mention above of immediately shifting into the detached observer and choosing to be different - following what I would perceive to be a spiritually correct way of being...what a trick that can be!...knowing what it should look like and then putting that on. So it's been another step past that to catch that moment and actually feel what is going on when I have the urge to disown my own sovereignty and believe I need anything outside of myself. I have to wonder every time I write on this site, am I doing it here as well? Am I seeking answers outside of myself - relatively speaking? Though the keys and reflections I constantly see here help to unfold the experience within...I do feel a deep level of trust with Openhand and I wonder if this is part of giving it away...not questioning it enough? Perhaps we'll see when the reflections aren't so comfortable =)!

Unexpectedly, the more I feel what is really going on rather than "correcting it", I am feeling an upsurge of wildness and an urge to lose control...it feels very centered in the 2nd chakra - which for me has been quite amazing to feel at all. I keep having the urge to dance until I fall on the floor and feel intense pulsation of energy from the lower centers upward. I get comical images in my mind of me going out in public naked or with disheveled clothes on and my hair all sticking up in all directions like I've been electrocuted.

With this unfolding this sentence really stuck out to me...
"Be prepared to lose control. Be prepared to express what you might consider previously as your lower darkness. But then integrate the truthful and authentic aspect of that, peeling away the distortion that you begin to recognise in the exploration."

So it seems those lower urges are being felt and now to feel out how to express them and peel away the distortion in a way that doesn't get me arrested =).

Thanks for this amazingly clear sharing!!
Jenny