Hi Sylvanheart, you asked a couple of important questions about betrayal and how to process through...

I got betrayed by one of the workers this week. It was a lesson in boundaries yes, but the way it was done was so disrespectful I changed how I see her now. But where I really got stuck today is the pain of it. The core wound of my mother's rejection. Still so much pain but at what point do I say ok it's time to move on? How do I know I'm not self-indulgent vs purging?

Firstly, whenever we feel disrespected, ask, "how am I disrespecting myself?"
Because of your perceived Mother's rejection, how are you reaching out to people in a way that isn't actually serving you?
How are you rejecting the Mother principle in yourself - by seeking or craving it in the external?
And so then, how do you project this filter onto others, which they can't possibly fulfill?
It's all about finding the Mother (and Father) energetic principles inside ourselves.

When is it time to move on?

You can only move on when you've processed it out. So we keep recreating similar patterns, making similar flawed connections until we break down the inner filtering that we project onto others and then feel betrayed by - because the other cannot fulfill the unconsciously projected expectation of them. In fact they're likely to feel put upon, obligated, or constrained by the energy. They're even more likely to explode and push you away.

In these situations, "processing" becomes self-indulgent if we're still expressing grief at "what the other did to us". Whereas when you take ownership, the processing is likely to generate internal integration - through self-acceptance, forgiving oneself.

The key is to find that sense of completeness in yourself - that doesn't become expecting or clingy of others. When you've mastered this, then your relationships will become more authentic and then fulfilling. "Betrayal" stops happening, because you're no longer betraying yourself and therefore are not needing to manifest the "betrayer" in your external.

I trust this makes some sense.

Open 💎