Hey, Steve, Biker Dude! I've been where you're at many times in my spiritual journey. Feeling abject despair and utter hopelessness. Like there's no point. Cause I feel so damn dark and shitty and aren't I supposed to feel more enlightened and jolly after all I've been through? Enough already. I've had it. And in those times, I've dropped out and licked my wounds, isolating myself like a wolf in pain. I, too, take heart from Trinity's words especially these, "Even those moments we fall off track we are STILL ALL IN." It can end there of course unless "we pick ourselves up and let go into our deepest depths again and again and again," as Trinity says. Sometimes I long for it to be "Abracadabra". Just a wave of the magic wand and all my illusions fall away. Poof! And there I am shimmering gloriously in the sun like an iridescent dragonfly. Pure light forever and always. Our true essence. But then I'm reminded that every moment has a purpose. Every moment is a chance to self-realize as the One. It may not instant karma. We may have to fall and fall again and again and go deeper and deeper still down that dark rabbit hole through all those layers of crappy conditioning piled on down through the eons. But in the end, I truly feel we're all destined for Nirvana. We're all destined to shine on eternally -- like the moon and the stars and the sun as John Lennon sang. Here's a clip from the film, "The Peaceful Warrior", a film I've watched countless times because it always inspires me to honour whatever I'm feeling but not get stuck there. Letting it flow through in whatever time it takes. Reminding me to pick myself up from the cold, hard floor. And begin again. So now I'm hearing the '60's song, "He's a Rebel". How can a biker dude like you possibly lose your magnificent, rebel soul? No way, bro! A favourite quote from "The Peaceful Warrior": "A warrior is not about perfection or victory or invulnerability. He's about absolute vulnerability." Lotsa Love, Cathy