Anticipating the flow / Acting prematurely

Hi Open, may I ask what you think about this?

As I said here before, after a relationship break-up I went to live with my parents. I lost almost everything I identified with, and this feeling of emptiness has left me with two choices only: either I don't live the flow fully - and so my ego fills that void with thoughts of suicide and murder - or I choose to fully live it and make great progress, as I have experienced in the past two weeks.

The major problem is my mother, who is a toxic person: egocentric, arrogant, noisy, and completely invested in the drama. She has always made life very difficult for our family, and still does. I'm commited to ascending, but her presence is doing the opposite, especially in this phase. And yes, I know I manifest what I'm being within and she actually can be a great catalyst for my unfolding. But in a practical sense - and this may be coming from ego, sorry - that's not what's happening.

I could sense that in a few months I'd be guided to buy a notebook, enabling me to work outside. I could really see the visions because they're connected to other synchronies regarding my career. However, now is NOT the time, probably because I don't have all the money yet. But since I could pay in installments, I decided to buy it. And once the notebook arrives, the flow will likely shape around this new acquision and guide me to work outside.

I know this is an attempt to escape the situation. But as you said in 5GATEWAYS, at the beginning it's difficult to access the source pain and our focus should be more on creating space for the flow. So I wouldn't say it's an extremely distorted decision, you know, it's not like I'm packing my bags and running away. What do you think?

Thank you Praying EmojiPraying EmojiPraying Emoji
Edu

Add new comment

This question is for testing whether or not you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.

Comments

Comment

Hi Edu - firstly I greatly commend the degree of self-reflection you've arrived at. It means you're empowering by taking ownership of what you create and why.

Sometimes there's a risk of getting a little too critical - too reflective.

To me, it doesn't feel like avoidance of your mother, but creating invaluable space. And if the possibility is there, why not do it now?

You could potentially make a mistake - but providing you learn from it, then you will have gained from it.

If you need to test the choice once more, just ask, "show me!" And then go with what the synchronicity reveals.

You'll always make an insightful choice - no matter how it goes.

Best wishes

Open 🙏

In reply to by Open

Comment

Hi Open, thanks again for your reply. And just thank you for all the work you do. I know you're just being yourself, but it's truly a blessing to have Openhand in our lives.

The possibility is there, but not in a very comfortable way. Yes I may be too reflective, but it seems a bit like I'm intending this manifestation. And if I think I can't make mistakes on the path, then there's the risk I keep on doing these minor control attempts.

I tested the choice as you said and it seemed positive, although sometimes I'm not sure if it's really a sign or just my subconscious giving attention to patterns that confirm what it wants (the notebook). But this "skill" is getting better over time.

However, testing the choice still feels like a subtle affirmation. You know, I'm not just asking "show me", I'm asking "show me this" - so who is testing? Probably the ego!

Edu 🌞

In reply to by Edu

Comment

Hi Edu - it is indeed a pleasure to be able to be of assistive reflection - thanks for your kind words 🙏

Maybe the key here is just to let things flow more from the heart. See how it feels to centre there and go with the pull. Then internally comment on what is happening. So the mind coming in just after the movement - where you're also watching for synchronicity clicking in.

Perhaps that's worth exploring.

Wishing you well with that.

Open ❤️