The Etheric Moon Circle

I felt to initiate an etheric moon circle in the Openhand community recently and had a wonderful exploration with Fiona and Tigger. We now invite you all to meet us on Sunday (for some tomorrow, for others today) at full moon in the ether!

Traditionally moon circles are only open to women, who meet and share a safe and sacred space, womb-like, in which they can dive deep and are regenerated and transformed, in which something greater than their individual selves are born and carried out into the world.

However, this is an experiment, something new, as far as I know. We are neither meeting in person, nor is the circle only open to women. Everybody is welcome to join in this etheric moon circle, to go deep inside and to see what arises, to acknowledge and investigate what the Divine Feminine will unveil, and to share what has been shown. This is an opening of a sacred feminine space for the masculine, a leap of faith, for me personally not a difficult one in our community, because I experience it as safe, nurturing and honouring the female qualities. I see many men here who have the strength and courage to live their female qualities. Other women will feel less comfortable with this, no doubt, but I hope they will nevertheless be interested and that this will be a small contribution to the growing Union of the Divine Feminine and Masculine.

This is the idea:

We meet in the ether every two weeks, once on the night of the full moon and once on the day of the new moon, I also like to call it the dark moon. As we are spread out all over the world, anybody who feels to do so, meditates or contemplates when the moon is in their time zone. They send their energy to the the moon, which reflects it back to the others in its path. Starting in the east, the moon passes by Gaia's heart chakra in Avalon in the middle of its trajectory and sets in the west. In this way, we create an etheric moon circle around the world.

It would be wonderful if many feel inspired to join in and to share their thoughts, feelings and experiences with us here.

Blessings,
Helen

Comments

Dear Réka,
Thank you from all my heart for your sharing on moon gazing and the loving words you found for me. I am answering here as I feel it belongs here. I am at loss for words for the beauty and magic of this all.
I am so happy to hear from you, you were in my thoughts all along as your sharings concerning and your love for women as well as your incredible knowledge and wisdom move me deeply.
I feel blessed to know you.
May we meet in the moon tonight!
With love,
Helen

I was quite excited about our first night of the etheric moon circle, especially after Réka had very timely shared her knowledge on moon gazing yesterday. This is what she wrote:

"... In doaist tradition there is a specific healing practice for women called 'lunar gazing'. It's quite a complex practice with movements and hand positions and breathing but the fact is: it probably is enough to simply align the main channel, connect heaven and earth, so to speak, and join the moons energies into the game. Heart and Womb centres are likely to be heated up, also a movement of vital, etheric fluids start moving, like sap in a tree trunk.

Gazing at it, the moon tends to go through a transformational 4 stage process (in fact it's her effect on our energy bodies and hence our changing perception). First it looks normal, second it starts to develop a halo but it's a different halo of light from what the moon normally gives off, and can turn purplish, though this can vary from person to person. After that this glow will expand out from the moon like a ring and separate from the moons borders. Some can even hear a low hum (I haven't ever). Last stage is, the moon begins to flicker like almost shaking in different directions. Pulsing is the best word to describe it. This perception is a result of our energy and moons energy to start interacting and regulating."

First I have to say, though, that about six months ago I started seeing the moon with a rainbow-like halo at a distance from the moon, with white light in the centre, and it has stayed this way. Since then I also see light bulbs and candle flames surrounded by a mist of light. Strong lights like street lamps, car head-lights and spot-lights now appear like stars with hundreds of rays of light, in the meantime they also have a rainbow-like halo around them. It's so beautiful that I love going out at night to see these lights.

So, the moon had this halo and I did Chi Gong while gazing at it. The blue ring of the rainbow got stronger and stronger until the halo was completely blue on the outside. Then clouds covered over the moon and I went to bed and meditated there (that's where I always meditate). I felt strong heat in my chest and abdomen. I fell asleep with the intention to wake up at 1 am, because at that time the moon would be over Avalon and would have risen at Tigger's.

I woke up at 10:59 (!) pm though. The sky was clear again and through the window, I could see the moon nearly in the zenith. I meditated again and felt strong energy from the moon above. I felt very intense heat in my body and probably what Réka described as movement of 'vital, etheric fluids like sap in a tree trunk'. My Womb centre and Heart centre were vibrating beautifully and I felt the energy from my feet to my head, which was particularly lovely, because my energy normally still doesn't flow downwards from my hips. I meditated till 1 am and sent the energy to the moon and right to Avalon and to the east coast of the States!

This morning my Womb centre was vibrant and my entire body was filled with a beautiful, harmonious energy. Thank you so much Réka, it wouldn't have been the same without your sharing. I'm wildly looking forward to more of this! It's just wow!

Hi Helen,

Thanks for the Etheric Moon Circle. It's great to read your experience, it sounds very powerful. I was aware of the magical wolf moon over the past couple of days - thank you!

Lovely to hear from you Reka too *bye*

With love, Fiona

In reply to by Fiona Reilly

Dear Fiona,
I still remember the warmth of our doula-to-doula talks and sharings under the duvets of the cold but cozy little cottage in Open and Trins garden :)
I am glad to see more of you since you moved to Glastonbury:)
With love,
R

In reply to by HG

Dear Helen,
Thank you for your sharing!
And "yepp": it confirms to me what we women know anyway: "the best 'meditations' always take place in the bed." ;)

With my very close friend and spiritual sister, we once had the chance to take ourselves out from the chores of life and service, went to hibernate into a village and found ourselves not being able to climb out of bed for 3 days (we shared a double), literally, and we just talked and talked -- and travelled far and wide, penetrated through layers, lifted veils, and shape shifted within and without... A funny story to tell maybe, but also one of the deepest spiritual works we've done in a long while...

I'm so glad to read your experience.
I was exhausted beyond words on full moons night and crawled to bed earlier than usual but was up at around 1-ish (a guess only as I don't have a clock next to my bed) and found myself sitting next to you, in the moon, as you say, and felt to hold your delicate and wise hand in mine. I felt your energy coloured by a life of deep acts of assistance, a kind of self administered bodhisattva quality, you know, a gatekeeper, standing at the threshold helping others to cross, but not yet crossing herself. I felt a delicacy and an aristocracy that does not follow money or status but is the mark of the carriers of a spiritual seed. And I met the little two year old girl, whose experience of separation lingers on into the layers of the solitude of a queen mother in service.

I am still so very deeply touched by being given this chance to connect with you. Thank you. And I am not using this word unnecessarily.

I thought of sending you some music... It's hard to find the original clip online, I only found this version, since it is by a not very well known singer, Anders Holte. He also has a track for full moon, but the one I feel like sharing with you now is this one:
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=L9BC_bRZPGU

Womb to womb,
R

Hi Helen,

Heartfelt gratitude to you and Réka for your insightful and inspiring comments and for your invitation to join the etheric moon circle. When I first read your post a few days ago, I felt incredible tightness in my body. I could hear myself saying, "I'm definitely not the right sort to join this circle." So I've been feeling deeper into the layers of my conditioning around my initial "reaction" and felt to post a few comments today.

What I've come to realize is that I have feared the moon throughout my life, just as I have feared acceptance and surrender, the essence of the divine feminine. Interestingly enough, the moon is at the apex of my astrology birth chart in the 9th House of spiritual consciousness with the rest of the planets pointing upwards towards it. From a synchronicity viewpoint, I feel this as an invitation in this incarnation to soften into my over-energized warrior ray 1 energy and "give up" the constant need to struggle, fight, conquer, survive, and achieve. Ultimately, to feel the peace and harmony that arises from balancing the divine feminine and divine masculine energies.

In my coaching session with Kim this week (thank you, dear friend), I realize that I will never be a soft, surrendered, ray 2 kinda female -- although sometimes, as a woman, I find it to be a most appealing option! For, indeed, I have a strong ray 1 warrior energy. I'm feeling that the moon is inviting me now to become the aligned warrior: powerful, passionate, committed to positive change -- trusting in the flow of divine benevolence -- without the need to control or manipulate outcomes. That which serves all life.

Full moons typically find me excruciatingly anxious, hyper-vigilant, awake, unable to sleep, acutely feeling the collective pain and screams through the ether, including my own, desperate for release, desperate for transmutation. Yet I've been resisting the call to go within, express, surrender, and let go, preferring to escape and deny.

A few months back on social media, I put together a photo of a wolf howling at the moon with these words ascribed to "Patty" that go straight to my heart:

i howl to sooth
a thousand hearts broken
stop and listen to me
as I sing my song
for all who can't cry

It feels like the right time to make peace with the moon and the disowned parts of myself. Thanks for providing a vehicle to help me do that.

With love and appreciation,

x Catherine

In reply to by soulseer

Dear Catherine,
glad to see you here... I'll explain below ; )

Many years ago when I started off with my work about the feminine my very first question was... what is feminine power (as opposed to masculine power)? Because to me the antithesis of power was (is) not surrender (certainly not victimized states) but another type of strength... In physics there seems to be a lot of talk about matter and antimatter (which is not void...) and in spiritual circles we talk about light (as expressive, radiant light) and dark light (like magnetic, even gravity like power), for instance.

So there is strength in the non-manifest too... In the introverted, in the vacuum... Very much so. But there seems to be a general misunderstanding in our society about what feminine really is...

I've had the chance to assist births (as a doula) and what I saw there was anything but weak... Did you know that the womb's muscles at the intensive stage of labour contract with an 80 kilo strength (needed to lift an 80 kilo object!) every minute! Surrender is part of feminine power but not only. I believe it is time well spent exploring the idea of what feminine STRENGTH means for us, personally, and collectively...

Full moon is a powerful time. I believe the howls and pains that come to the surface in many of us is the pain of unexpressed yin power. We express plenty of yang powers in our lives, obviously -- it is a speciality of our 21st century woman's world. But the power of the yin is, to most, unexplored, or misunderstood, or feared, or labelled.

And now personally to you Catherine, if you allow (?) First of all, I appreciate honesty and straightforwardness, always! And I'm having a funny little smile here, because though at present I'm not as much actively involved on the OH web community as I used to be but from the few posts I read the last few days it happened to be yours from some time ago that stuck out for me considerably. It was about the distortions surrounding David Bowie's death. I mourn the guy deeply and personally, but I actually did take your point in... It sticks out for me. But mostly: I "smelled" (as it is my job to do) the special pain that I always smell in women who have work to do (within and then without) on the sacred feminine.
And here you are! Isn't it so beautiful!

I wish you a wonderful exploration of your howling wolf!
With love,
Réka

Dear Réka,

what a lovely thing to do, a private retreat in bed! A very womb-like experience, sitting and lying in a warm bed sharing with your closest friend like that for many days!

So my experience around midnight, my time, was so powerful and special because you were there, holding my hand! I'm sorry to say though, that my hands aren't delicate, I'm always working in the garden without gloves because they spoil the fun, so my hands get grubby and I can't be bothered to keep my nails well groomed. I would love to have beautiful hands, though. Maybe they are, etherically!

I was overwhelmed by your beautiful vision and acknowledge it humbly. Yes, it is my deepest yearning and joy to be of service. But I know that I still have many gateways to pass before I am capable to and can be trusted to help others. I sense that I may have been a mirror for yourself, as you have all the qualities you saw in me. This is very beautiful. I am full of gratitude for your being here and for our beautiful connection.

Let the time of lonely queens belong to the past, now is the time for sister- and brotherhood, for unconditional love, comradeship and support!

And a thousand thanks for the video. It made my heart melt.

With love,
Helen

It's the smileys I put in!

Welcome, Catherine, it's lovely to have you with us and very exciting. Wonderful answer, Réka, I'm going to learn so much from you.

But one thing is sure, the feminine is not just loving and soft. It was oppressed for centuries because it is also very powerful, very awe inspiring and also dangerous. The Goddess of life and of death. Yes, time to live our power!

... happens to be the sacred number of "the queen mother and wise woman" -- according to Carl Gustav Jung (just saying ;) )

I see me in you for sure, as one can only light a spark from a fire already burning within (St Augustine)

yet there is one gate we women find so hard to pass through (if I am allowed to say so): the one of self vindication.

You are powerful and special, already. No need...

I am so very much enjoying this thread of thoughts and feelings and experiences.

I walked the dogs on the full moon, saw it framed between palm trees in a picture-postcard sort of image. I stopped, and felt the lumination the almost pulsating throb of energy. Like a heart. Like a big white heart. I could feel the dogs' energies in my hands, through the leather leads, like reins. The dogs stood quietly, drinking in the moonlight, and attuned to the unfamiliar sounds of suburbia: a noisy street several blocks away, people talking (why is it that humans speak so loudly in condensed spaces?), cars driving fast. But for a few precious moments the dogs and I were a triad with the moon. And I thought of Helen and Fiona and then all the woman in the world looking up at the moon and breathing the white heart.

I have always loved the moon, felt a kinship, a fellowship with her. When I had wolf-dogs, we'd go out on the full moon and have what I called "sing fests". Sierra, Ravenwolf and I would tilt our heads back and sing to the moon.

As I was reading this thread this morning, I came to Reka's video. As soon as it started, I put my head phones on, closed my eyes, and was transported. There was water behind my eyes, of deep joy, of deep connection. I saw the four Bird Humans again, and then one opened its wings in front of me, great span of white feathers and long human legs and the message: see me, see me, see me. When the music ended, my eyes were watery with such profound feelings and I felt an incredible one=ness.

Not five minutes later, I was faced with an unexpected challenge...someone had gotten into my locked car and stollen my purse, all my identification, credit cards, a lot of cash, all my check books. At first the anxiety, the need to just scream or cry hit me like a freight car. In trying to soften I found it hard to connect with my mind. When I called the police they informed me that there was a ring of thefts on keyless entry systems (which my car has): they can open a locked car, grab anything, and then lock the car.

I found myself stepping out of myself, as I went through the tedious, time-consuming process of banks, department of motor vehicles, credit card companies, asking myself: what is it that is really bothering you? Is it the loss of the purse that a dear friend gave you several years ago because I loved the color pink? Was it the wallet, given by my mother to me after my Dad died? What is it that is hurting me so?

And I realized in the afternoon shadows today, that it was the darkness being revealed. The shape of a consciousness I cannot fully fathom.

love, tigger

In reply to by Spiritpaws

Dear Tigger,
Glad to 'meet' you, love your doggies!! : )

Stolen purse might be symbolic of the treasurehouse of our wombs... Women have been treated badly and robbed of their power for a long long time....

I wouldn't necessarily offer the analogy if not in a moon circle, but we happen to be in one... ; )

Might feel like checking, if it resonates? : )

I'm sure during our work with Openhand, and elsewhere, we all came across the notion of how what needs to move inside manifests on the outside, however annoying to the ego it often is.
I certainly noticed both in my life, and others, how exactly/precisely the very moment I (unconsciously) touch upon a thread/program to be healed inside, both personal and collective levels, the "external" world comes to my "aid".

Women have their shadow sides, no question about that, YIN has her destructive, shadow power too, no question about that either. But. It is also true we are all healing a personal and collective paradigm, within ourselves and without.

Now I'm off to see a bunch of pregnant ladies for a morning yoga class!

A very beautiful day to you all, I feel the power of the full moon changing, I'm sure it will be expressed in one of the many ways it can.

Onward!
R

Good Morning/Afternoon Everyone,

I just wanted to post and tell you all how much I am enjoying this gathering. In ways I feel like a child sitting among a group of wise women and that feels very healing as there is this piece inside that yearns for that communal connection with other women, that longs to feel full and complete and matured in this woman's body - comfortable in it and able to express fully through it...that yearns for the place where we are surrounded by the aligned expression of our masculine and feminine energies and how it relates with the masc/fem expressed through the male form as well - I feel the sadness of that missing and the growth of integrating these aligned energies. I have felt within me a rejection of the feminine, a disconnection from the womb - a hardness that has protected that more flowing and open space...I know I am not alone in this as we look at the larger picture. This is starting to shift within me slowly...I recently felt drawn to take some belly dancing classes - I am really excited about it - feels like a beautiful way to connect to my body - to embrace femininity, sensuality, full embodiment, empowerment. The moon cycle within has been disturbed and unflowing over the last few months and this month came on full force...and I felt that like a weight - so tired and unmoving - like a thick encasement all around me. It's starting to lift now but there is still an urge to stay slow and quiet.

Thank you all for your beautiful sharings - I so enjoy listening to them and gleening reflections from each of you.

With lots of love,
Jen

Thank you so much, Jen. I love your sharings and your unconditional honesty. You are a wonderful woman!

I wanted to share some wise words out of a book by Hilary Hart, "Body of Wisdom", as I feel what she communicates here has so much to do with the creative space of the Moon circle.

"On all levels, creative space is an in-road to and out-road from the sacred. Space is sacred because it is empty of our own personality and needs, and alive with the ineffable, unceasing, eternal energies of life. But creative space is not just absence; it is a cauldron of life forces beyond our own personal will or intention, like unconditional love, peace and other divine energies.
...
Spiritual transformation seems to always depend on creative space, on knowing when and how to watch and protect space for transpersonal and divine energies to emerge. In individual practice, meditation and prayer are containers for just this kind of process. Both require a time and space to turn inward, away from outer distractions of the day and inner distractions of mental chatter. They open our being to what flows from the inner worlds.
...
Through honouring space, we allow miracles to happen. Grace can be given, love can grow, and life-force can build in creative momentum. These forces are beyond what we can create on our own. They require a devotion to the unknown, an attunement to magic, a love for possibility, a commitment to give despite not knowing what will ever be given in return.

Because the living template of pregnancy and birth is present in every woman, our instincts are attuned to working with the power of creative space. This power is highly connected to women's power to purify and to restore harmony, as we do this in our bodies every month.
This power is also highly linked to women's recognition of life's sacredness. We recognise life's sacredness because we are part of it during the miracle of birth, and we honor and live that miracle through unconditional love.
In the modern world, the last thing women should do is take a back seat to men and the patriarchal destructiveness taking place all around us. But we do need to remember our power and live it in any and all circumstances, and the power of creative space, which is as invisible as the power in the womb, demands that we develop deep trust in inner, hidden processes that might or might not be acknowledged by the outer world we live in.
For many women, the imperative to work with creative space will feel natural. We already long for what takes place in this space, just as we long for love, just as we long to be ourselves."

Here is a link to a short interview with Hilary Hart in which she introduces her book, which is a treasure-house and absolutely life-changing.

http://youtu.be/wDywF8sOKD8

In reply to by HG

you know, Helen, it's one of my favourite books? <3
creative space, yes... symbolically speaking: the chalice, the grail...
i'm sure we all will, in our own time, discover the deep significance of whatever it means for us in our personal, and shared, lives...
thank you for the link, too

Helen, Réka, Tigger, Jen!

I'm truly thankful to be in this moon circle with such amazing sisters. Each of you inspires me in your own unique, special way. Réka, I resonate with what you say about the full moon attuning us so acutely to the pain and suffering of suppressed and unexpressed yin energy. You have, indeed, scented me out correctly about needing to heal wounds around the sacred feminine. I appreciate that you get where I was coming from re Bowie's distortions. It means so much to feel understood. Thank you.

These days I'm sinking deeper and deeper into how feminine power feels to me. I have been immersed so long in trying to survive in a patriarchy by taking on distortions of divine masculine energy and largely shutting down divine feminine energies. As women we are called to express such surrendered vulnerability, openness, and strength in our sexuality and in giving birth. How battered we have been down through the ages for being who we are. It takes such enormous courage to soften and surrender inside, let go of control, and honour, trust, and flow with the deepest whispers of our hearts and souls. I'm gradually making friends with the splendour of the moon as she shines the light on my distortions and illuminates the path to freedom. I'm taking more time to be quiet and still and to listen to the unmanifest.

Tigger, my heart goes out to you. I'm becoming more mindful about asking Divine Benevolence to show me what I need to see about myself when I'm caught up in painful experiences. When I pay attention and soften into patience, the answers come. Wishing you well, dear sister.

"The sky was lit
by the splendor of the moon
So powerful
I fell to the ground
Your love
has made me sure
I am ready to forsake
this worldly life
and surrender
to the magnificence
of your Being."
~Rumi

The moon truly is such a magnificent expression of the beauty of the sacred feminine.

Much Love,

Catherine

In reply to by Réka

Hi Reka,

Remembering our connections and sharings in the garden cabin warms my heart. It was so beautiful to share with you! I was really inspired hearing about your work, it's such a gift to the world.

With a big hug, Fiona

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7kbTaMoJRE

I was given this video today that spoke volumes to me and I felt to share it here. The photographers are follwing their souls and doing what is divinely given, shining light and spreading beauty through the darkness. In the reflection through the horses, I can see how the wild aspect of ourselves (in male or female vehicle) is beautiful and how awesome to express this, to let it free.

These two lines particularly stood out...

"Heart of the problem is that there is no value put on wildness"

"...show the beauty, as I feel that beauty will inspire change"

With love, Fiona

Fiona!

This is the second time this beautiful video has come to me since yesterday so I'm feeling the wild horses showing up again as an invitation to go deeper still, let go, and unleash my soul, and just be, wild and free. As we once were before Opposing Consciousness bound and gagged us and turned us into slaves. The song "Born Free" from the 1960's film has been singing in my heart since Kim first posted this on Facebook yesterday. The movie affected me so deeply when I first saw it way back when just as this video does. It's time to throw off the fetters and gallop wild and free through the meadows. It's time to break through to the other side!

"Born free, as free as the wind blows
As free as the grass grows
Born free to follow your heart

Live free and beauty surrounds you
The world still astounds you
Each time you look at a star

Stay free where no walls divide you
You're free as the roaring tide
So there's no need to hide..."

Thank you for this. So lovely you're here in this etheric moon circle!

xx Catherine

Rena, Helen, Fiona, Catherine, Jen: I feel your collective presence and gifts. I am so honored to be in this circle.

The video brought up a lot for me. As some of you may know I actually work in the horse world. I see first hand how captivity and domesticity affects many horses. I have had the opportunity to work with a small group of wild horses that were rounded up in Nevada, teaching their new human "owners" how to feed a wild horse. These horses due to stress and the typical commercial feed diet quickly become metabolic with a disorder known as Insulin Resistance. In humans this is known as Type 2 diabetes.

On my farm we have 8 horses, all retired competition horses, as the farm is a retirement horse farm. Two are mine, the others are boarders. About 20 years ago I had a revelation about keeping them in a herd with minimum human contact. This gave me the opportunity to really observe herd dynamics and learn from the horses how they wanted to live and interact. People thought I was crazy not to keep them in stalls, manage the turn-out, etc. These retired horses in a herd live considerably longer, don't colic, don't get sick. They rarely ever need a vet. My retired Grand Prix horse is now 29 and we have been together since he was 4.

At the heart of horse stall confinement is the human need for control and convenience. I feel this in part why our culture does not honor wildness.

love, tigger

Hi Helen,

I wanted to share my thoughts on something you shared above as I could see myself and my own previous doubts reflected in it. You stated -

"But I know that I still have many gateways to pass before I am capable to and can be trusted to help others."

I now believe (after much exploration) that no matter where one is on their spiritual journey or in relation to the gateways, one is capable of helping others and being of divine service and will be invited to do so. Just by being true and following your soul, you can inspire and shine the light. The simple example of starting this thread illustrates how you are being of divine service and helping others in your own unique and beautiful way.

I have found that in helping others, I learn more about myself and that in turn helps me - there is a positive feedback loop. I am always drawn to those whom it is right for me to work with - sometimes it amazes me. For example I may be exploring a particular distortion and then a client or friend comes along and shares their process around exactly the same theme.

I feel that if I were to wait until I was fully capable I would never be ready. Take for example me having worked as a doula, many would say that I wasn't capable of such a supportive role as I don't have my own children (this lifetime!) and I had reservations, yet being a doula was a remarkable journey, it brought huge healing and gifts to me and I can also humbly say to those I worked with. I see it in so many areas of my life, where I felt the pull and just had to take the plunge and dive in and then through the experiences and "mistakes", I learn, develop and am of service.

One question has arisen in regard to where the trust to help others would come from? Who would be trusting? Hope that makes sense...

Thank you lovely Helen for encouraging and facilitating this exploration and expression from within me <3

With blessings, Fiona

Hi Tigger,

I felt very connected to you when I saw the video. I had shivers throughout my body as I read your post. Thank you for the love and care you show to the horses and showing others how to do the same. I have a sense of how the work you do helps to heal the collective herd, it's of immense value.

With love and gratitude, Fiona

Hi Fiona,

The link to "Born Free" you provided says it isn't available in my country, so here's a link that is with a photo montage from the 1966 film by the same name that won an Academy Award. My heart always soars when I hear this song! I feel such a deep longing to be free and unfettered. Thank you!

https://youtu.be/ov6aef8DTqg

Tigger, I'm always blown away by your beautifully poetic descriptions of your caring stewardship of Mother Earth and your loving and compassionate communion with all of God's creatures, great and small. How sad it is that losing our trust in the flow of divine benevolence and taking on the energies of control and manipulation have brought us to the brink of the Sixth Mass Extinction. The slavery and control bumps down from OC to homo sapiens, to nature, and to our animal friends such as these splendid wild horses.

In all of this, I feel my grip loosening on my need to control in order to feel safe in a world that continues to trash openness and vulnerability. It feels like I might burst apart in thousands of pieces if I don't. Memories are bubbling up about being terrorized and brutalized under the light of the moon down through the eons. I am fearful about letting go. The moon has witnessed the tragic defiling of the sacred feminine for too long. Like us, she longs to transmute her pain and celebrate the rise of the divine feminine.

x Catherine

Catherine, I wanted to let you know that your words: "I have been immersed so long in trying to survive in a patriarchy by taking on distortions of divine masculine energy and largely shutting down divine feminine energies" really resonated with me. In fact I could have written those words myself.

Your words in fact opened up a chasm of memories for me, things I've blocked, events I've disassociated. I crawled into the tub last night, turned off all the lights, and felt fractures of memories fall around me like confetti.

For so long now I've thought of myself as androgynous: part male, part female. I was sterile at 24 from a total hysterectomy, which launched me into menopause that in 1977 no one was talking about. I never grieved the loss of my womb because I had a very clear feeling that raising children was not what I incarnated this time to do. But it changed me in how I saw myself.

I don't know if younger women know what it was like to break out of the few choices women used to have:wife- mother, secretary, nurse, flight attendant, teacher. Careers like business, law, medicine, engineering were the bastion of males. When I started my business career in hospital medical/surgical sales for a very large company I was one of 2 women in a sales force of 200 men. The only other women in the company were secretaries. It was literally a man's world: a patriarchy. Sexual harassment wasn't even a term back then: it was the "normal" way women in the workforce were treated on a daily basis.

Catherine, I so understand your words: "my need to control in order to feel safe". Paradoxically, it has been my experience that even in the illusion of control we are not safe. I say this as a rape survivor. What I personally have learned is that safety is the in the seat of the soul.

Guess Helen, Catherine, and I qualify for "quasi-elders" of this circle :-)

love, tigger

Oh, Tigger! Réka, Fiona, Catherine! The moon in Capricorn has called forth all you beautiful, wise, courageous elders. I feel blessed to be in this circle of sisters, holding hands, sharing, giving, receiving.

Thank you for your thoughts and kind words, Fiona. Yes, as soon as the ego has stepped aside to a sufficient degree, one is able to help. I just couldn't see myself as a lonely queen, high above others. I am also on the way, still learning like everybody else, but yes, I'm not waiting to get anywhere to live fully!

The horse sharings are so wonderful! Thank you so much!

I was asked yesterday why I opened the moon circle for men. One of the reasons I mentioned is that anybody in the OH community can participate passively anyway, reading what has been posted. After I had written this, I went back to reading my book, another book by Hilary Hart, called 'The Unknown She - Eight Faces of an Emerging Conciousness' (another phantastic book, btw). And synchronistically the first thing I read was this dream, told by a woman:

"I look through an open door into a room. What strikes me is the sheer number of books lining every wall. I very much want to meet the man who lives here, and I enter in. The man arrives and there is an instant recognition. He is a stranger but I respond as if we are old friends. The atmosphere is electric for I can see the same regard in his eyes. The room beyond has a double bed in it and as a very natural course of events we end up on it.
After making love I start to dance for him. I am already naked but as I dance it is as if a veil falls revealing a mystery that is in turn veiled. And again as I move another veil falls to reveal a yet deeper level of this mystery that is itself veiled and so on. This veiling and unveiling of the mystery of the divine feminine. While I dance the man stands silent and motionless, never taking his eyes from me.
His presence is terribly important because in this dynamic he is shown something of this mystery and I come to experience the mystery, and the joy inherent in it. It is at the core, within my own body.
The man then expresses some of his fear of how the world will find me changed, the stiff poise and decorum replaced by something vital and dynamic which will make many uncomfortable. How the world fears a natural being, fears Nature."

So, what I called a passive participation is of course a very active one, that of the observer or of the seer. Many thanks to all who have joined us and are playing this terribly important part, men and women alike!

Hi Tigger,

I'm with you totally that hanging onto the illusion of control does not generate feelings of safety. Indeed, feeling safe lies beyond all the veils of illusion In the seat of the soul as you so beautifully put it. I get this on an intellectual level but I'm not there yet on an emotional level. So I will keep softening into the fear that grips me.

I led an Openhand style meditation at a local non-denominational church yesterday, centred around letting go of whatever we're holding onto, of whatever we feel we need, to create space for higher consciousness to flow into us. The feedback I received was very moving and touched my heart so deeply. The meditation resonated powerfully with many of the participants who I sense long to let go. All we can do is keep softening into our fears, opening, expanding, and breathing the light of our souls through them. Openhand has so much to offer to so many who long to be free. I felt this profoundly yesterday when I shared information about Openhand at the church.

Thank you for your openness and generosity in sharing your experiences, Tigger. I have only tears, no words, for the suffering you've endured as a rape survivor.

I definitely share your experiences of coming of age in a much more patriarchal world than we live in now. Women back then forged the way to open doors for the women to come. Although my daughter and her generation have more choices open to them, other choices are narrowing with regard to marriage and having children. Have we truly made any progress, I ask myself, particularly after seeing a new documentary called The Hunting Ground, a searing indictment of rampant rape and sexual violence on American college campuses and the failure of schools to seek justice for the "victims" in the name of continued funding and donations. It's heartbreaking to watch, yet I am immensely encouraged by the courage of the young men and women who are speaking out and taking on the institutions. Overall, I'm feeling that we haven't come very far at all with regard to the oppression of women in society.

Helen, I appreciate your thoughts and reflections on welcoming men to this moon circle. I am open to inclusion. We're ascending and balancing the divine masculine and divine feminine together, sisters and brothers. I love you all.

x Catherine

The moon is so elusive.
It plays hide and seek with me.
I try to find it,
to figure out where it is today,
but it hides behind the blue sky,
blended out by the sun.
It has always surprised me,
suddenly appearing as a delicate silver sliver
in the morning sky,
or at sunset.
But it makes me sad, that I never know
where it is.
And still it makes the oceans breathe,
the seeds grow,
and the roots dig deeper into the soil.
I need not know,
rather feel deep inside.
Before it was banned by
the artificial lights of humanity,
it made the women bleed,
regularly, together,
made the blood flow,
cleansed and purified
all men, women and children.
So much is forgotten,
banned, trodden out of our consciousness.
This darkened moon makes me feel sad.

Sadness is our pathway towards sanity, as pain is our sword to power, and longing is our carrier to oneness. It's always the paradox: in doubt lies certainty...

I only have time for a quote about this special Aquarian New Moon coming up, and relevant to your sadness, Helen.

(Btw it's my favourite time around Imbolc, and in my birth sign of Aquarius ♒ )

"... Another archetype that illuminates the deeper themes playing out during the upcoming lunar cycle involves the asteroid Cassandra - who is conjunct the sun and moon. Cassandra was a prophetess that could see into the future. She originally was a priestess of the Goddess, but when patriarchy took over she became a priestess of Apollo. Apollo was struck by her beauty and wanted to have sex with her but she did not want to have sex with him and this infuriated him. He then laid a curse on her saying she would see into the future but no one would believe her. Hers was a journey of trusting herself and her intuition even when everyone else around her thought she was mad!

With Cassandra on the Aquarius New Moon there can be great visions of the future incoming: messages, visions, dreams and prophecies about our personal and collective future. This new moon can foretell the future- but we all must have ears to hear and eyes to see so we don’t miss it.

It is highly recommended to work with this new moon in a different way than you would typically do so. Instead of focusing on intentions, calling things in and taking conscious action- perhaps you can stand in a place of opening, receptivity and fluidity- allowing the current of the New Moon to take you somewhere new of it’s own accord? It's also recommended to use the Aquarius /Uranus energy to radically shift your life from the inside out first- rather than focusing on the outside and thinking it will change the within."

See more at: http://www.divineharmony.org/cosmic-insight-divine-harmony/divine-harmo…

Looking at the future, with the eyes to see it and ears to hear it when it would burn out your eyes yet standing in a place of opening, receptivity and fluidity - is not this the core message of Openhand? This is some New Moon.

Thanks for the bigger perspective, Réka.

"Hers was a journey of trusting herself and her intuition even when everyone else around her thought she was mad."

I have gone through such a shift recently that I feel I have left all my loved ones behind. I can't talk to them, they (would) think I'm mad. I feel there in no common ground left and this is deeply saddening to me. It's difficult to let go. So let's see where this New Moon is taking me.

Hi Helen,

I've been there too - left everyone behind, and indeed they did think I was mad. Of course if they have a very conditioned perspective, they're going to struggle with an expanded one.

But there will be bridges that it's possible to build. You don't have to say everything that you feel. But you can continue to feel it nevertheless.

Between souls, words represent less than 10% of the communication, and yet the words - and the thoughts they represent - take over in most people's minds. So work to keep the dialogue as open as possible. Yet always feel into the truth that you are. Some people may naturally come back to you, others won't. It's just the way the cookie crumbles.

Wishing you well

Open

Reka, my birth sign is in Aquarius too. You really stumped me on "..it's my favorite time around Imbolc", I wondered, did you misspell something? What in the world is Imbolc? Had to go look it up :-)

Helen, I am experiencing something similar as you are with friends in my life. I don't feel as much sadness as I do a kind of deep acceptance of the let-go: the big sigh. Some of these friends have been friends for 30-40 years, we have a history of joys and sorrows together. I used to be a kind of "fixer", trying to reharmonize a situation, trying to bring awareness, stepping into drama to mediate it. I can't do that anymore.

It is not easy to stand on the shore and watch loved ones, dear friends, bash themselves into the rocks again, and again, and again.

For my grandmother's people, this month is the moon of the deep snow, the time of hibernation, of reflection. Fitting indeed that this new moon calls on bear medicine.

love, tigger

What belongs to private, belongs to private and I had written that to Helen in that form earlier.

Here I feel to share only that what Helen put into words up there is more than a personal story, life situation or a stage of her spiritual journey.

But also it is a strong current in the collective feminine as of now, during this very present time. In the last couple of months especially, tidalling in its effects in the world manifest. A very beautifully powerful great flow of black brilliance (as my best friend named it) that many women feel and experience in all its myriads forms, or personal facets, stories. Helen's sadness and feelings of separation is as much hers as any one of us (willing to feel).

At this New Moon or other time, it is a possibility to feel into this luminous darkness and into the questions it brings up into light for us all.

Yes, these are times of great change. And then there are growing pains, if one chooses to grow, that is. I've often noticed that an inner change will have an effect on others, even without talking about it, Open.

I acknowledge and welcome my sadness, that was once called melancholy and was very appreciated in the Romantic period! But sadness, sorrow, melancholy and boredom are no longer tolerated in the matrix. There are pills and cures for that sort of problem nowadays. But I'll take some bear medicine and let the current take me.

With love,
Helen

Hi Helen,

Well if you feel melancholy be melancholy - don't avoid, go right into it and let it express through you. Then look for any attachment - can you totally accept things as they are? At some point, you're sure to tire of it.

With love and support

Open *give_rose*

This etheric moon thread is helping me to become more aware of my feelings and all their nuances and is much appreciated, given that I was karmically disassociated from my emotions for most of my life. The Moon is in Aquarius in my birth chart in the 9th House of spiritual consciousness. At the time of this new moon, the Moon is once again in my 9th House, which I'm feeling as an opportunity to let go of that which no longer serves my spiritual evolution, and open to new ways of being about how I connect and express to others. This new moon has aspects to Mars. As it approaches, I have felt an upwelling of anger and frustration at the ways I'm not connecting, aware that I'm trying to control the flow, attaching to how I would like it to be, rather than surrendering and respecting the way it is and how others feel. So I'm feeling into letting go of the efforting and what I'm holding onto, asking Divine Benevolence, "Show me where to connect so I can serve the highest good." I'm feeling a mish-mash of emotions about fine-tuning and balancing divine masculine and divine feminine energies. Mars is aspecting Chiron in this new moon. Chiron is the Archetype of the Wounded Healer and his appearance can bring up old wounds to be healed. Chiron was abandoned by his mother at birth. The theme of abandonment has run through my life in many shades and forms. Deep down it feels like the inability to communicate and connect and be seen and loved for who I am. I'm feeling the energy of this new moon as an invitation to further heal the wounds of this conditioning and connect with the divine flow to help others heal their wounds.

x Catherine

Thank you, this is a really interesting thread for me. There's a part of me that would like to explore and connect with this and another that finds it hard to connect, almost like I don't feel tangible enough, if that makes sense. There doesn't feel much of a construct around anything at the moment...just the place where I'm at right now.

I read this from Open here and it's a big one I feel 'Between souls, words represent less than 10% of the communication, and yet the words - and the thoughts they represent - take over in most people's minds. So work to keep the dialogue as open as possible' - when I saw that those around me were not going to be able to connect with the experiences and shifts I was having - I felt to just stay open, without words and see what emerged, what came through those around me was unexpected, supportive and very surprising. So I try not to cast people out but to see what's possible from an open space - to form bridges - we mustn't underestimate that :)) We don't have to leave everyone behind.

With the new moon and you all in mind, this morning I walked in a pine wood.
One tree seemed over laden with cones while her lower branches, carrying the cones looked dead or dying. It spoke to me of seeding the future and that this is our work now (also connected to the Angels poem on the other thread): seeding the future, in another form, in another place as this world ends.
As Kd says antisscipate nothing in the time that is next, not of your family and friends and their reaction to who you might be
just be as you are and feel what it shows you now. The next breath will be born from what is now. That's the gift I give thanks to the new moon for

So many beautiful sharings, Chiron the wounded healer, the bridges, the seeding of the future!

And thank you again to Open who told me in a dream last night to go to church! I woke up and had this image of a beautiful mediaeval Franciscan church in southern Italy, that I love. It has very similar wall paintings to those in the church of Saint Francis in Assisi, but it is mostly empty and quiet and has a peaceful, meditative atmosphere. I remember once sitting there in silence, in the cool semi-darkness with my son and we both felt a loving, deep and vibrating energy in our hearts. So I was reminded by this dream to stay in my heart, to find peace, love and strength there, and not to fear, try to work things out or to control the outcome.

I experienced such spontaneous, heartfelt, intimate sharing yesterday in an informal, drop-in group open to whomever hears the call. I was asked to lead the same Openhand style meditation I led a week ago in another group. The word of the divine spreads and resonates...trust...unconditional love...acceptance...surrender...letting go...opening...expanding...crescents of soft moonlight bathing burned flesh...luminous slivers flowing through painful cracks...gently washing away the debris...what no longer serves.

"Put your thoughts to sleep;
Do not let them cast a shadow
Over the moon of your heart;
Let go of thinking."
~Rumi

Much Love,

Catherine

Love to my fellow sisters of the moon.

Yesterday on the new moon I went to one of the watershed preserves that take in water from Lake Okeechobee. I walked out along the edge of the marshes, was greeted by butterflies (thank you Trinity) and the music of the shore reeds in the wind. I lay in some marsh grass listening to the ducks, watching the herons and egrets. Water and sun: so much light, and for me a reminder of lightness, the antidote to density.

In my meditation I became a reed in the water, a duck swam around me, brushing her wing against me, I felt my roots, minerals and nutrients drawing up into me, the wind speaking, I moved without resistance, the water always whispering: we are one.

Reka, thank you for posting Trinity's article and the ensuing discussion on moontime. It was compelling, confronting, and something I wish I had read 40 years ago.

love, tigger

Slowly coming out of the depth of the learning curve I've immersed into in the last days (weeks) following New Moon... Heavy, yet beautiful experiences, insights and visions.

Let me be womanly and no explaining, intuitive and simple here at this Moon Circle -- I'd rather just leave this clip without any more comments, if you don't mind -- if you have time, a call to do so: watch it, if not, don't... :)

<3
Réka

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Em-y2D7tVY

Thank you for sharing Reka, this speaks to me and is helpful to how I feel. I like that he refers to 'Kali' it's an energy I have come to know and sometimes gets overlooked in the feminine stereotype but it can break through so much here if we are open to it. much love kx